b3ta.com user Jabberwoc
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FP-IST.
FRONT PAGE EXPERT.
TEACHER OF FRONT PAGE TECHNIQUES.
FRONT PAGE LORD.
BOOK "HOW TO FRONT PAGE" AVAILABLE IN ALL GOOD BOOK SHOPS.
PRIVATE FRONT PAGE LESSONS.


Xbox Gamertag: Sgt Beanpod.
I'm shite at Call of Duty:Ghosts but if you want an idiot to run across open ground for you, I'm in.



DORCHESTER based photographer.
DORSET, ENGLAND, 49, male, old enough to know better.
Dust-Mask-Self-Portrait-Me-Stroked-Border-7819-1
Pig Nonsense. The book what I wrote.



Recent front page messages:

If your plastic fox turd is missing please inform your newsagent.


Click for much the same (380 kb)

(Fri 3rd Nov 2017, 16:34, More)

New York Times: “Titanic Sinks Four Hours After Hitting Iceberg” [16th April 1912].

There, I did it. Sue me.
(Sun 20th Dec 2015, 17:32, More)

"I CAN'T BELIEVE IT©!!".
ispitinyourgrave
(Fri 3rd Jul 2015, 0:31, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Shit Claims to Fame II

I did Bjork up the wrong 'un in a Poundland in Romford.
Oh no, wait...that was a dream I had.
(Sat 22nd Sep 2012, 21:43, More)

» I'm Sorry I've Written A Joke

What's yellow and very dangerous?
China.
(Sat 20th Jul 2019, 1:26, More)

» I'm Sorry I've Written A Joke


Q. Why did the horse cross its legs?
A. It REALLY needed a poo.
(Thu 10th May 2018, 22:48, More)

» Ignorance

I had an ex who thought you put the white bit under the pizza in the oven with it. The foam. She was a dozy sod. Nice tits, though.

(Wed 24th Feb 2016, 20:53, More)

» Housemates From Hell III

The Crossbow Killer.
I lived in a shared flat in Stafford Uni's tower blocks in the early 90s. One flatmate had a liking for weapons - he had a replica of Deckard's pistol in Bladerunner, an air rifle which had double maglite sight and was uprated , several paintball guns and a blank firing desert eagle replica which he once fired in the flat and left a ringing in our ears for two days.
His prize weapon was a full-size crossbow. Moments of madness included firing it through our front door, across the hall and into the neighbours front door and the time he shot one of the doves which visited the balcony of everybody's flats. We got some right stick from the female inhabitants of the tower blocks for that. Might be because he shot it point blank through its head and left the bloodied corpse at the foot of the flats for a full day. The bolt disappeared into the council estate somewhere. We never found it.
(Mon 16th Mar 2015, 10:21, More)
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