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» Toilets
Berliners ain't so shy - ugly dollops!
Was on trip to Berlin with college a couple of years ago. Many, many groBbiers, many wursts, and lots of sauerkraut were playing havoc with my tract. Ich habe ein katzenjammer (can't remember past tense now dammit).
We wandered about in Berlin for ages trying to find a public toilet to relieve my self-inflicted bum-danger.
I found a row of (empty!) stalls in a shopping arcade, went to the last cubicle and prepared myself for blast-off.
Then I heard some fraulein thunder in and get into the stall right next to mine (in an empty bog-house), drop her kecks, and have the noisiest, porcelain-spatteringly loud plop that I have ever heard.
This must have offended the Englishness in me - toilet noise is sacrosanct and must not be heard by anyone, as other posts in this qotw have attested.
So then I had to leave without completing the job, in great discomfort, as this hausfrau was blasting her bum off.
(Mon 5th Sep 2005, 16:13, More)
Berliners ain't so shy - ugly dollops!
Was on trip to Berlin with college a couple of years ago. Many, many groBbiers, many wursts, and lots of sauerkraut were playing havoc with my tract. Ich habe ein katzenjammer (can't remember past tense now dammit).
We wandered about in Berlin for ages trying to find a public toilet to relieve my self-inflicted bum-danger.
I found a row of (empty!) stalls in a shopping arcade, went to the last cubicle and prepared myself for blast-off.
Then I heard some fraulein thunder in and get into the stall right next to mine (in an empty bog-house), drop her kecks, and have the noisiest, porcelain-spatteringly loud plop that I have ever heard.
This must have offended the Englishness in me - toilet noise is sacrosanct and must not be heard by anyone, as other posts in this qotw have attested.
So then I had to leave without completing the job, in great discomfort, as this hausfrau was blasting her bum off.
(Mon 5th Sep 2005, 16:13, More)
» That's when I knew it was over...
I realised he was a compleat twat
I kept meeting up with my ex-bf for drunken sex shenanigans, as he had originally chucked me to go back to his ex (we weren't in love so it was no great shakes, just a little pride-denting).
An accidentally overheard phone call in a Liverpool bar made me realise that he had gone on holiday with this broad to the Dominican Republic for two weeks, while we were going out! He said he was on holiday with his dad! No wonder the photos weren't forthcoming.
That was the exact point that I realised our friendship (based around getting fucked up on drugs and drink and then fucking up) was a little bit over.
Oh well, I was glad then that I accidentally gave him an STI.
Only joking.
(Wed 27th Jul 2005, 11:44, More)
I realised he was a compleat twat
I kept meeting up with my ex-bf for drunken sex shenanigans, as he had originally chucked me to go back to his ex (we weren't in love so it was no great shakes, just a little pride-denting).
An accidentally overheard phone call in a Liverpool bar made me realise that he had gone on holiday with this broad to the Dominican Republic for two weeks, while we were going out! He said he was on holiday with his dad! No wonder the photos weren't forthcoming.
That was the exact point that I realised our friendship (based around getting fucked up on drugs and drink and then fucking up) was a little bit over.
Oh well, I was glad then that I accidentally gave him an STI.
Only joking.
(Wed 27th Jul 2005, 11:44, More)