» Scary Neighbours

nosey neighbours
It started with a gentle knocking at my door. On opening I was delighted to see a beautiful leggy brunette standing there, she had a dash of red to her locks, like a rabid women of Celtic origin...I didn't mind. The whiff of real scented perfume fluttered up my prominent and slightly crooked nose.... she smelt great....It was fair to say at that point on I would never love anyone else.

within her deignty hands was a cream cup stained red from her lipstick....very red. "would you mind terribly if I could trouble you for some sugar" she said in a soft maiden like voice.....I felt my heart sink. Without a word I grabbed the cup and ran to the kitchen where I filled it up with sugar. I felt a twinge downstairs, the pills had stopped working and the blood rushed from around my body into my once flacid now rapidly growing manhood. If I told the doctor about this I would almost certainly be sent back to ward 9. Before I knew it I was fucking my hand with such fury that my
fucdge stick threw out an alimighty whack of man fish yogurt...I didn't get it all, some of it was wasted, but some I managed to get in the sugar...it was enough.
I rushed back to the door, thrust the sugar pot into her ever so deignty hands, they were so small. I slammed the door shut....I was embaressed.

It was the night after before I finally plucked up the courage to go round. I set myself high up so I couldn't be seen. It was hard the 'tools' kept digging into me. I waited in that tree for over three hours. I don't know what I expected to see. A man called at her house...he had ginger hair and a bonny face...I was furious...

most of it was blurry after that, but I can recall most of the noise. Agonising screams, and gargles as they choked on their on blood. you can live for hours without intestines, but they didn't make it. It might have been the blood loss...I've lost the skill with the knife, or maybe it was just too rusty. I releived myself over the still corpses. I could play for hours with a good warm heart if it didn't dry so quickly, still I took pleasure in arranging them alphabetically....I like things in order, it gives me peace.

It wasn't long before the police turned up....the neighbours had heard everything. the nosey bastards.
(Fri 26th Aug 2005, 10:41, More)

» Toilets

milk shinanigans
I tried to shit in a girls kitchen drawer whilst she was upstairs once....couldn't pull it off...although it made me realised I desperatley needed to piss....on that note I opened her fridge and lagged into a four pinter.

fridgid bitch drank it as well without even knowing.

I also shoved a teaspoon into my arse and laid it back in the drawer......tea is served.
(Wed 7th Sep 2005, 16:42, More)

» Toilets

Jaques
And I shed a tear for poor old Jaques...would he remember, I think not. He would be enjoying the last of the summerwine with old friends whilst I whittled away the hours with a bottle gin from days gone by.

Poor old Jaques he is no more.... He lost the lot and had to go. If only the young girls could help but they cackle and miningle like birds of a feather.

Oh poor old Jaques....can't you come back.

back

again.....
(Wed 7th Sep 2005, 16:37, More)