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- a member for 19 years, 3 months and 4 days
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» World's Sickest Joke
Man walks into..
...a sex shop, he says to the guy behind the counter wheezing due to his asthma " I need some help, I'm looking for a sex doll ..wheeze but I don't know if I want a white one or a black one...wheeze". "well Sir" says the guy behind the counter " I can see that your struggling with your asthma so why don't you take our new Muslim model....They blow themselves up"!
(Wed 7th Dec 2005, 12:51, More)
Man walks into..
...a sex shop, he says to the guy behind the counter wheezing due to his asthma " I need some help, I'm looking for a sex doll ..wheeze but I don't know if I want a white one or a black one...wheeze". "well Sir" says the guy behind the counter " I can see that your struggling with your asthma so why don't you take our new Muslim model....They blow themselves up"!
(Wed 7th Dec 2005, 12:51, More)
» School fights
a new school record!!
Within 1 week of me starting my scholarship at a posh private school I did nothing for the stigma of poor kids being rough. Having grown up in an area where if you said something about someones mum you bloody well had to back it up with a few Jabs to the head, I had no idea that posh kids used words to hurt people rather than their fists. One such prissy tit decided to say that my mum was a whore. At this revelation I proceeded to punch his bloody lights out. I remember this episode because a) I followed said prissy boy up to the secretarys office whilst he was bawling his eyes out with a bloody nose she mistook me for a friend and asked me who had done this. When I answered her that I had, she nearly fell off her chair! b)I was accused of 4 counts of bullying..always wondered where those other 3 came from!! c) Held the record for gaining a saturday morning detention ( 1 step down from suspension)in the shortest period ( 7 days). However I did spend the next 6 years getting grief for being the poor kid, so I don't regret this incident at all!
apologies for length...please dont hit me!
(Fri 10th Mar 2006, 14:36, More)
a new school record!!
Within 1 week of me starting my scholarship at a posh private school I did nothing for the stigma of poor kids being rough. Having grown up in an area where if you said something about someones mum you bloody well had to back it up with a few Jabs to the head, I had no idea that posh kids used words to hurt people rather than their fists. One such prissy tit decided to say that my mum was a whore. At this revelation I proceeded to punch his bloody lights out. I remember this episode because a) I followed said prissy boy up to the secretarys office whilst he was bawling his eyes out with a bloody nose she mistook me for a friend and asked me who had done this. When I answered her that I had, she nearly fell off her chair! b)I was accused of 4 counts of bullying..always wondered where those other 3 came from!! c) Held the record for gaining a saturday morning detention ( 1 step down from suspension)in the shortest period ( 7 days). However I did spend the next 6 years getting grief for being the poor kid, so I don't regret this incident at all!
apologies for length...please dont hit me!
(Fri 10th Mar 2006, 14:36, More)
» Posh
Posh or Not????
My family are rougher than a dogs chuff, however when i was a kid I was considered rather clever and somehow managed to earn a scholorship to a rather posh private school. Getting bullied at school as I was poor and then being bullied outside of school as I was considered posh left me somewhat warped but hey I turned out ok with a "posh" accent but a "salt of the earth" type moral base. Met many posh people whilst during my time there..Duke and Duchess of Kent probably take the honours of Poshest, but many retired colonels etc at old boy meals. Have found that there are twunts from both sides of the fence and likewise there are some really cool people so have found I always take people for who they are not what social background they are from. Wahay first post result!!!
(Fri 16th Sep 2005, 11:54, More)
Posh or Not????
My family are rougher than a dogs chuff, however when i was a kid I was considered rather clever and somehow managed to earn a scholorship to a rather posh private school. Getting bullied at school as I was poor and then being bullied outside of school as I was considered posh left me somewhat warped but hey I turned out ok with a "posh" accent but a "salt of the earth" type moral base. Met many posh people whilst during my time there..Duke and Duchess of Kent probably take the honours of Poshest, but many retired colonels etc at old boy meals. Have found that there are twunts from both sides of the fence and likewise there are some really cool people so have found I always take people for who they are not what social background they are from. Wahay first post result!!!
(Fri 16th Sep 2005, 11:54, More)
» World's Sickest Joke
Funny Old Year
First the blacks in New Orleans get a pool in every yard, then the Pakistani's get Sky in every Room.
1 way ticket to Hell please!!
(Wed 7th Dec 2005, 12:56, More)
Funny Old Year
First the blacks in New Orleans get a pool in every yard, then the Pakistani's get Sky in every Room.
1 way ticket to Hell please!!
(Wed 7th Dec 2005, 12:56, More)
» Your Weirdest Teacher
Bonkers Billy Blackman
We had this RE teacher called Billy Blackman, The staunch Welsh Rugby supporter, constantly had cotton wool in his ears and at the end of every term used to show us videos of the hayday of welsh rugby in the 70's with the likes of Barry John, JPR Williams etc. I think that video was playing all day everyday in the final week of term! I do now feel that he did me a favour ( or maybe the videos had some kind of subliminal messages in them?) as I'm now engaged to a welsh girl, live in wales and can actually discuss these games with everyone.....apparently my knowledge of the golden era has made me an honourary welshman! cheers Billy! funny old world!
(Thu 10th Nov 2005, 10:25, More)
Bonkers Billy Blackman
We had this RE teacher called Billy Blackman, The staunch Welsh Rugby supporter, constantly had cotton wool in his ears and at the end of every term used to show us videos of the hayday of welsh rugby in the 70's with the likes of Barry John, JPR Williams etc. I think that video was playing all day everyday in the final week of term! I do now feel that he did me a favour ( or maybe the videos had some kind of subliminal messages in them?) as I'm now engaged to a welsh girl, live in wales and can actually discuss these games with everyone.....apparently my knowledge of the golden era has made me an honourary welshman! cheers Billy! funny old world!
(Thu 10th Nov 2005, 10:25, More)