b3ta.com user mr sausage.
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» Ripped Off

I own a hotel in Australia,
and one of our biggest sellers, is the famous Bundaberg Rum. We have a drive through bottlo, but with heaps of thieving black fella's around, any displays we have, eg:Bundy Rum, has to be dummy bottles full of tea.
Anyway, I put on this new barmaid, sexy as hell, brunette with massive.. err.. eyes.....
she was quite bright, and a hit with the locals obviously. A real top chick behind a bar even if she was just moonlighting from her dayjob.

We had a really busy Friday night, with almost every bloke in the place falling in love with this chesty barmaid.

One group of punters, were stuck into the Bundy, and with an empty bottle at the bar, Big Eyes, ducked out to the bottlo to gab another bottle of rum.. as innocently as one would.

So the mentioned group, kept up with downing rum like no tomorrow! And loving it!

After a couple of hours, I had to pull them up, and put them on the water, they were just getting a bit too rowdy.

Anyway, we closed up, and during cleaning up that night, I found the empty bottle Big Eyes had been serving these gentleman with, empty on the bar. These were marked of course (barcode taken off) So after several questions of how this bottle had gotten there, and empty, found out the truth!

Awesome, I'd made about $200 off these blokes, drinking tea!
It just amazed me how they actually continued to get drunk off drinking a placebo!!!

They've been in since, and I've certainly more than made up for the mistake, gave them a tab for an evening, and being good blokes, they were quite understanding..

Big, um, Eyes though you ask??

Of COURSE she still has her job!
Nicer to look at than the missus!!
(Sat 17th Feb 2007, 15:12, More)

» Take my Mother-in-law...

voices
my MIL isn't too bad apart from her annoying whining..... worst part is my other half is just starting to sound exactly like her...
I was woken the other morning actually thinking my M.I.L was actually in the house screaming at our son... may I hope the other half doesn't turn out like her completely..starting to think it might be too late!!

(she can inherit M.I.L.'s butt though, it's heaps better then hers!! )
(Fri 9th Sep 2005, 11:23, More)

» Posh

I once put on a shirt
and a tie for that fact, and met up with a total hornbag of a chick I'd met on ICQ. She'd been flirty as a half drunk, overweight yank batting off over cyber.. but when she turned up she was sexy as hell! We went out to tea, then to the only casino in Canberra (Aus) and bumped into friends of her parents, and was introduced to, and chatted with none other than Bush's best mate, little Johnny Howard.
Don't like the sleaze, but I still acted (and I was) astounded to meet him

(oh, and yeah I knocked the bird off later that night)
(Fri 16th Sep 2005, 17:28, More)