» My computer gave away my secrets

Back at college...
As at every college/school/uni there is always the one suckup who goes through the years without ever being in trouble. Our kissass, however, made the mistake of leaving the computer lab for a short while leaving himself logged on... Next week he was found crying in the toilets as his parents were making him go to councelling due to the disturbing amount of incest rape he had viewed in the short time he had left the lab the previous week and obviously the head had been in contact with the family- he was never as cocky after that.
(Fri 10th Feb 2006, 12:33, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

How do you crucify a cripple?
On a swastica!
(Mon 24th Apr 2006, 12:54, More)

» World's Sickest Joke

What is the difference between a breeze (cinder - for the yanks) block and STDs?
A 3 year old can't carry a breeze block
(Sat 11th Mar 2006, 18:03, More)

» School fights

School Rugby
Again when in Surrey I managed to make the rugby A team for my school. We were good and won many a match but then came the match against our local rivals. The match started and it got more violent than most in the first few minutes but nothing special until one of the opposition jumped on my mates head right in front of the ref (who was their coach) which he somehow didn't see. Feeling unjustly treated we decided to gain justice our own way. Next time this guy got the ball 15 players moved in resulting in a massive ruck with my 18 stone friend in the middle moonwalking on this guys chest. Pause for ambulance as guy has several cracked ribs. The match continued much in this way till the end (we won!) but it was back in the changing rooms where it got really messy. We were changing in seperate rooms to the other team but the wall between both rooms had a 2/3 foot gap in between. It kicked of again with insults flying over the divide and then shoes, bins, padlocks and a showerhead. Injuries on both sides but still we won the match and they had guys who needed hospital whereas the worst we had was my mate who had had his head jumped on leaving a few cuts - good times
(Fri 10th Mar 2006, 14:49, More)

» School fights

Surrey Schools (and not really about the fight)
I moved to Surrey at the start of my GSCEs having previously lived in the uneventfull Norfolk. Now we had a rather 'old school' teacher who broke up a minor fight between two people in his lesson one day - nothing major - one of the two involved was given detention, a year 9 girl if memory serves, she turns up to detention but the teacher is on lunchtime duty so he locks her in the room and leaves her for an hour. Now the silly bitch didn't go to the toilet before her punishment and had no way of leaving the 1st floor classroom - the cupboard was never the same again and the teacher was sacked.

The moral: If your going to fight then don't do it in a lesson - thats what the playground was for.
(Fri 10th Mar 2006, 14:26, More)