» Barred

I was barred from my Student Union bar...
... for two weeks. I'd drunk two bottles of red wine, and; feeling slightly the worse for wear; went into the lavatory to orally evacuate my guts. Being the pretentious art student, I didn't want to vomit into a toilet like anyone else would do, oh no. In my enlightened state, I decided the best way to resolve my problem would be to put the toilet seat down, sit on it, and project my blood red porridge on the floor in front of me.

This method of dealing with over-indulgence has yet to catch on.
(Sat 2nd Sep 2006, 15:28, More)