» Evil Pranks

Several Small ones (ooh err)
not as involved as some of the posts (or as funny!), but from
my days working in Consumer support for a then large ITcompanya few spring to mind which might give some techs out there ideas:

The old swapping the M and Nkeys - Connecting another mouse or keyboard and making random movements or comments - Setting up an outlook rule when a collegue had foolishly left his terminal unlocked to launch our database again everytime a new email was received. -Taking a 'Print Screen' of the desktop hiding all the icons and then setting the new bmp as the wallpaper.

convincing one of our admin girls that left handed biros were available - (the ball point rotates the other way to make it easier for left handed people apparently)

Another favorite standby - Can you call back Mr C Lion? -
The last girl that did this said 'how rude they've put the phone down on me im going to call them back and give them a piece of my mind'

Covering an entire car in warehouse shrink wrap and on a seperate occasion filling one with those polystrene packing chips.

Convincing a none too bright tech that the game 'Black and White' which had just been released and that he had a copied verion of had sophisticated anti piracy software (which nicely tied into a then current news story about the game having some spyware in it for that purpose) and that the police would be raiding his area shortly - caused him to bury his hard drive in his back garden and but a retail version of the game. Cant remember if we ever told him the truth!

That was also the same guy that we setup a rule in his outlook that forwarded all his private emails from his girlfriends hotmail account to a public folder - cue much piss taking.

And finally - Setting up various autotexts in outlook when one of the girls left her machine unlocked subsituting 'monday' for 'tuesday' and "Love and Kisses" instead of 'regards' and various other things of that ilk - took about a month before she noticed! Idenied all knowledge.

To really spread mistrust throughout an organisation though just create your own organisation chart, remove all the existing heads of department, merge departments promote the most unlikely people to senior positions mark it something like "Quarter 4 reorganisation plan" and stick half way down the paper tray of a photocopier or printer - When its eventually spotted on the back of a printout and the rumors start, they'll be denied - Well they would say that wouldn't they if they're going to lay people off etc etc - Literally months of fun :-)

mutters something about length
(Sun 16th Dec 2007, 18:36, More)

» Cheap Tat

mistaken identity in poundland!
All this talk of poundshops has suddenly made me recall... whilst as a student I worked for a high street chain (also mentioned in this thread) - I was sent down the road to the local poundshop to purchase some dusters or some other cheap tat (yay worked it into the qotw :-) - Whilst wondering round poundland looking for whatever it was I was approached by a shopper - probably confused by my 'uniform' who asked me where something was -

A quick reply from me in in one tired from a life of dealing with the public and seeing a way to get my own back with no comeback - was along the lines of "I'm far too busy to help the likes of you, why don't you naff off and shop somewhere else" before wondering off further into the store and then legging it.

Cheered me up no end but I did spend the rest of the day hoping she didnt come into my store! Always wonder if they got a complaint.
(Tue 8th Jan 2008, 20:40, More)

» My most gullible moment

Left handed biros and the power of suggestion.
I once worked in a call centre and like every job I've ever had there always seems to be at least one gullible person within the team.

I convinced said girl in this case that a left handed workmate needed some more left handed biros.
You see with a left handed biro the ball rotates anti-clockwise when you write making it easier for lefties to write.

Not only does she collect a pack from a suitably primed workmate, but when I get her to try one out is convinced it feels really strange...

probably looses something in the retelling but it was funny at the time - I tried the Tartan Nail-Varnish gag but even she wouldn't fall for that.
(Fri 22nd Aug 2008, 4:47, More)

» Shoplifting

more reasons..
although i hasten to add I never actually tried this being as honest as the day is long, I do have the sort of mind that likes to think about things like this.. my local (now replaced) Safeways at one point introduced these weigh your own fruit and veg machine where once you'd bagged your loose fresh veg etc you placed it on the nearby scales and pressed the appropriate product button and it printed out a barcode based on the weight of the item that you stuck onto the bag, and that the till monkey scanned when you went to pay - I never did work out what was stopping you holding some of the items up as you weighed them or adding additional ones once the barcode was printed.

On a similar but related note of theft but not shop theft I've often wondered given the limited i.e. none counterfitting measures on pay and display parking tickets just how many people if anyone just scan one in and photoshop a new one whenever they need to park.

Given that its left behind the windscreen and so cant be closely examined I reckon you'd save a fortune given the prices of car parks near me!
(Sat 12th Jan 2008, 22:06, More)

» Road Rage

1st post!
www.b3ta.com/questions/roadrage/post63449/

was even funnier when it was in FHM and you even managed to miss the punchline off whereby the learner stalls it again and the policeman who's left the loudspeaker on by mistake says to his mate: "look the dozy twunts done it again'

*pop*
(Wed 18th Oct 2006, 10:44, More)