b3ta.com user IFallDownALotThud
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Profile for IFallDownALotThud:
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Hi :)

Here's the only thing I've made so far which isn't total wank:

Also I'm female, thanks.

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» Failed

My HNC at College
I took an HNC in IT at college to waste a year before going to university (I'd done 5 highers but was still only 16 and the thought of being IDed in the union depressed me).

Halfway through the course I got 5 unconditional offers from universities, but was it that which made me stop trying in college?

No... as a 16 year old girl still discovering her sexuality, I started becoming obsessed with my Norwegian teacher. She was dark-haired and wore sexy little boots, with the pointiest boobies imaginable. When she started having her female 'friend'* come into classes, and then sneaking off with her halfway through, it was too much. I took extra Norwegian courses instead of doing my IT work, and spent most of my IT classes daydreaming about her perkiness and sneaking to the toilets to masturbate.

Of course, I failed to pass 3 of my IT modules. I also failed to realise that I was rubbish at Norwegian, so I failed that too, which failed to impress my sexy teacher.

*Probably was just a friend, but in my fantasies she was the bottom
(Sat 6th Jan 2007, 13:38, More)

» Where is the strangest place you have slept?

Living my teenage years on an island
I quite frequently woke up in fields and the like. Once I woke up curled perfectly around a cow pat, arms above it and knees below. It was moist and fresh too, so I'm not conviced it was there before I fell asleep. And I once woke up in the scoop of a JCB in a locked building site with 8ft high fence, no idea how.

Also, once I had a dream where I was trying to crawl head first back into my mother's vagina to get back to her womb. I woke up in fetal position under my desk with my feet in my laundry basket, very strange.
(Fri 29th Dec 2006, 15:24, More)

» Failed

I tried to hang myself with a rope from a coathook, which then tore off the wall.

I also tried to jump off a cliff at my local beach, forgetting that I was at the only point on the cliff where there's a little ledge about 10 feet down. I really hurt my ankle.

I tried to drink bleach and just threw it up. Tried to take an overdose of paracetamol but they'd only sell me 16, which made me sleepy.

Oh and tried to stab myself through the heart but apparently kitchen devil bread knives aren't the best choice as it just broke.

Ooh I sound a bit emo don't I?
(Fri 5th Jan 2007, 16:25, More)