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- a member for 17 years, 3 months and 23 days
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» Housemates from hell
The girl you didn't want to move in.
It was December a few years back, and we'd had a couple of dud housemates that had to be booted out, and now we need someone else quicksmart, or the rent wouldn't get paid.
A girl arrives, dressed like she was in college, and announced she had a german sheperd, but he wasn't any trouble. Fine, we were desperate, being just before Christmas and all. She moved in, the dog stayed out the back, and things were fine for a couple of days.
I met her boyfriend and we went out for a drink, just the two of us. He turned out to be great fun, and we got completely rat-arsed, both ending up with a couple of slappers, neither of which was my new housemate. The next three days in a row we did more or less the same thing, and I'd return home, where the girl was none the wiser.
Prepare yourself, this is nasty.
I stumbled home one morning, and walked through the house to find the new housemate on the floor of the kitchen in a pool of blood and fluid, and she was in hysterics and a lot of pain. I picked her up and put her in a taxi and took her to hospital while she explained she'd recently had an abortion from an accident with this guy, and she knew something had gone wrong. At the hospital they took her in and loaded her up with antibiotics.
With nothing else to do to help, I returned home, to find the dog had gotten in and licked up the puddle in the kitchen.
(Fri 6th Apr 2007, 22:40, More)
The girl you didn't want to move in.
It was December a few years back, and we'd had a couple of dud housemates that had to be booted out, and now we need someone else quicksmart, or the rent wouldn't get paid.
A girl arrives, dressed like she was in college, and announced she had a german sheperd, but he wasn't any trouble. Fine, we were desperate, being just before Christmas and all. She moved in, the dog stayed out the back, and things were fine for a couple of days.
I met her boyfriend and we went out for a drink, just the two of us. He turned out to be great fun, and we got completely rat-arsed, both ending up with a couple of slappers, neither of which was my new housemate. The next three days in a row we did more or less the same thing, and I'd return home, where the girl was none the wiser.
Prepare yourself, this is nasty.
I stumbled home one morning, and walked through the house to find the new housemate on the floor of the kitchen in a pool of blood and fluid, and she was in hysterics and a lot of pain. I picked her up and put her in a taxi and took her to hospital while she explained she'd recently had an abortion from an accident with this guy, and she knew something had gone wrong. At the hospital they took her in and loaded her up with antibiotics.
With nothing else to do to help, I returned home, to find the dog had gotten in and licked up the puddle in the kitchen.
(Fri 6th Apr 2007, 22:40, More)
» Where is the strangest place you have slept?
I awoke with a face covered with makeup
on mate's couch, and on the table nearby there was a camera. Putting 2 and 2 together, I realised I had provided them with some fun that previous evening during my comatose drunken state.
Sitting outside in the sun later, doing the post mortem on the night before with my mate, he told me about how I'd been tea-bagged, and he couldn't wait to get the film developed. At that point I pulled the film out of my pocket and held it up to the sunlight for him to see...
Turns out that same roll of film also had nudie shots of some fit bird he'd pulled a days prior, all of which now are lost forever!
(Thu 4th Jan 2007, 11:19, More)
I awoke with a face covered with makeup
on mate's couch, and on the table nearby there was a camera. Putting 2 and 2 together, I realised I had provided them with some fun that previous evening during my comatose drunken state.
Sitting outside in the sun later, doing the post mortem on the night before with my mate, he told me about how I'd been tea-bagged, and he couldn't wait to get the film developed. At that point I pulled the film out of my pocket and held it up to the sunlight for him to see...
Turns out that same roll of film also had nudie shots of some fit bird he'd pulled a days prior, all of which now are lost forever!
(Thu 4th Jan 2007, 11:19, More)