b3ta.com user I have a face
You are not logged in. Login or Signup
Profile for I have a face:
Profile Info:

I'm nineteen. I'm a student studying biochemistry, and I'm a long-term lurker and reader of QOTW and the newsletter, but only just joined up as a member. I play some electric guitar, do some general nerdy shit and get drunk. I'm crap at photoshop and other art, but I always appreciate the pretty pictures we get around these parts.

Recent front page messages:


Best answers to questions:

» I Drank Meths (pointless teenage things you did to shock)

This is the story...
I used to enjoy hanging around after school as a teenager playing basketball with my buddies on the playground at the end of the day. This was great most the time, until that day where some twats came on and started harrassing us while we were having fun.
They started by taunting me as I made shots at the basket, jeering everytime I missed. I shrugged it off as normal behaviour. They continued over the week creating as much nuisance as possible with graffiti and intimidation etc. I dealt with it a lot from them for a while.
But soon enough it took on a more violent character. I was getting shoved around. Normally I back away, but this was simply not on, to come to where I was while enjoying myself and generally harrassing me. I then decided I had to stop this shit.

I got in one little fight and my Mom got scared
she said "You're moving with your auntie and your uncle in bel-air"

I whistled for a cab and when I came near,
The license plate said 'Fresh',
And had dice in the mirror,
If anything I could say that this cab was rare,
But I thought 'Nah, forget it - Yo, home to Bel-Air!'

I pulled up to the house at bout seven or eight,
I yelled to the cabbie 'Yo home, smell ya later!'
I looked at my kingdom,
I was finally there!
To sit on my throne as the prince of Bel-Air!

Yours sincerely,
W. Smith.
(Wed 25th Jul 2007, 1:23, More)

» Your first cigarette

One time when I was 17
I thought I'd try smoking a cigarette.

I suppose you could call it MY FIRST CIGARETTE
(Wed 26th Mar 2008, 16:43, More)

» The Dirty Secrets of Your Trade

I work for Nuts
Every issue, whenever we can't come up with anything good (that's most the time) I just log on to this website called bee-three-tee-ay and nick a couple of the funny pictures off the front page, without even asking the artists' permission to print them. LOL!
(Sun 30th Sep 2007, 19:36, More)

» We have to talk

Same ex I was going out with this year
Shortly after breaking up I phoned her and let her know that my balls were fucking killing me, and I said we should both get tested. She then turned this around to deliver the "We have to talk" line. I agreed and she dropped by and took me to the pub.

It was surreal, because our lives had been a shitstorm the previous month, and we just hung around in the corner of the pub, kissing and cuddling in ways that no exes really should. It was quite nice, for once.

She then dropped revelation after revelation upon me:

- She is an ex-hooker.
- On her stint as a hooker she had sex with "At least 300 men"
- I apparently had a bigger nob than all of these men.
- She's doing coke again.
- Her psycho ex was out of prison and she was planning to see him.

And it eventually turned out my balls hurt because I was wearing boxers a bit too small. Phew.
(Mon 23rd Apr 2007, 2:39, More)

» When were you last really scared?

A mate and me
A few years back we were sodding about by the stairs at school and all of a sudden he pointed out a box to me on the wall. We opened it up and lo and behold - it was the security system thing for the building we were in. After a few minutes we got past the pin code (1234. honestly...) and started going through the options. One of these was "Sound alarm".

"Go on, push it." I said, not expecting him to actually do it. And if it did the worst that would happen is the alarm going off just in this small building we were in, right?

Wrong. He pushed it, and all of a sudden the fire alarm across the whole school erupted and hundreds of kids were flooding out of wherever they were, moving to the field. Me and him promptly crapped ourselves. Him especially. We spent the rest of the day in fear of eventually being called to the headmaster's office, it never did come though.

The funniest part though is that he had red ink on his hands after a mishap involving a red pen breaking in the last lesson. This left dirty red fingerprints all over the keys of the security-box-thing. If the school had only been wise enough to locate the source of the alarm, he would have LITERALLY been caught red-handed.
(Fri 23rd Feb 2007, 23:40, More)
[read all their answers]