b3ta.com user UnstableDan
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Profile for UnstableDan:
Profile Info:

5 INTERESTING FACTS, as seems to be the vogue...
1) I am an insomniac, I see a sleep therapist (lol, the rapist) but it has proved little use so far :(
2) I am half Welsh/half English
3) I am a whizz in the kitchen, with my Italian and Indian meals being a speciality!
4) I once scored 5 penalties out of 5 against an International goalkeeper (Football, or Soccer for the Yanks)

I'm a tall, gangly streak of piss, my nickname in the pub I work is Marlon, like Marlon Dingle, off of Emmerdale.
They can all fuck off.

I like sports, and play several to a decent level (county).
I spend as much time as possible on b3ta, officelolling, and as much time as possible knobbing my Mrs!.

I have an 8yr old daughter, but still like the odd Maddie joke.

Im about right for this place.

Recent front page messages:


Best answers to questions:

» Childhood Ambitions

I too longed to be famous for potions and chemicals and such like.

This all began as I closed my copy of Roald Dahls 'Georges marvellous medicine' proclaiming it to be a great read and I was off upstairs to do some 'research' into my new found aim in life.

I spent a few hours putteng EVERY BOTTLE OF EVERYTHING in the house IN THE BATH and mixing it around using Unstablemums besterest wooden spoon.

Things went wrong thusly,

*Unstablemum had to unscrew the lock on the bathroom door as I had passed out due to the noxious fumes, twatting my head on the sink in the process.

*Concussion ensued.

*The bath was stained a lovely delicate blue.

*I had no pocket money for WEEKS.

*The bathroom took months before it smelt normal, the fumes having infiltrated the carpet and the wallpaper.

I never mixed anything again.
Till I found alcohol.
(Thu 29th Mar 2007, 14:17, More)

» Best Graffiti Ever

whilst drunk, at the weekend, after hours in the pub I work, i ventured into the freshly painted gents loo's!!

i scribbled, in tiny letters, on a pristine surface, and Im not proud of this by the way,

'yay, first post'

(Tue 8th May 2007, 11:46, More)

» Mad Stuff You've Done To Get Someone To Sleep With You

I met a girl on monday.
We went for a drink on the Tuesday.
By wednesday I was in her pants.
The dirty nymph wanted it all week as well.

I had to take sunday off though as my old fella was raw.

I love teh slags me.

(Mon 16th Apr 2007, 10:01, More)

» Best Graffiti Ever

stood in Shrewsbury train station, (god help me) a Central Trains express service whistled by, daubed in the dirt, along the length of 3 carraiges, it did say,

I did a right old chuckle at that one.
(Thu 3rd May 2007, 17:27, More)

» Well, that taught 'em

There was a man, who for the sake of authenticity, we shall call Mick, for twas his moniker, who loved practical jokes.

loved em.

Many a member of staff (for there was much cameraderie betwixt the blokes working there in my day) recieved a spray from the hose or a rotten pear attack, or even a dunk in a bin of fish guts/water.oh the hilarity.

It came time for him to leave our hallowed store, and 'lo, a payback was inevitable.

A new car had been purchased by himself, and it was shiny, and treated like a firstborn.

It should have had a target painted on it.

We waited for him to venture to DAS TOILETTEN (random Deutsch) and lifted the keys from his jacket.

icing sugar was added to the vents, and then they were pointed at the drivers seat and placed on 'full'.

The radio was put on LOUD!!!!!!

A contraceptive placed over the exhaust (tail pipe for the yanks)

and then the car was wrapped expertly with around several hundred layers of clear pallet wrap.

It took him hours to get it off his car, with out scraping the paint.
Then he got in, gave us a wave and started the engine.

The look on his face was priceless, as he was covered in icing sugar, assualted around the ears with RADIO RAVE (tm) and a massive bang from the back end of the car.

He was fuming, but laughed it all off jovially enough.

We certainly taught him!!
(Thu 26th Apr 2007, 17:26, More)
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