b3ta.com user zyn (thetix)
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Recent front page messages:


play it
(Thu 14th Nov 2002, 22:47, More)

the birds seem to be
migrating very strangely this year...

(Thu 24th Oct 2002, 21:46, More)

despite his massive meme on b3ta,
no hands lost his career to sex, drugs and rock n roll. now he can only be seen stalking the still rich and famous furtive with a jealous, jealous heart...

(Sat 19th Oct 2002, 9:06, More)

little timmy
didn't like the new babysitter very much.

(Tue 24th Sep 2002, 20:18, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Shit Stories

I thought of another.
A friend of mine was once driving on a turnpike toward Philadelphia, PA when he suddenly had the explosive urge to make shit. Forced between shatting himself or taking an exit to New Jersey, he chose the latter. (If you are familiar with the States know that New Jersey is NOT a desireable place to go, especially around philadelphia area.)

Arriving at a rough ghetto of town, his arse making stronger argument than ever, he pulled into a bar. A group of drunkards eyed him like zombies watching fresh meat, and he had to buy a drink for one in order to use the bathroom.

After exploding on the toilet, he realized there was no toilet paper. However, there was a shower curtain for the stall which he proceeded to tear off and whipe his arse with, leaving it there.

Moral of the story, fuck New Jersey.
(Wed 5th May 2004, 22:50, More)

» Shit Stories

a few weeks ago
I ate an entire vegan pizza comprised of soy cheese, 'tamater sauce, and wheat crust.

Several hours later, I took a squeeze at a public john, and the fecal matter that resulted spanned across the water, measuring roughly 15 inches (no exaggeration) . It was probably the size of my entire large intestine, but was quite painless when leaving.

I also remember from my youth eating only the green coloured balls of an entire box of Trix cereal in one sitting. I shat green. I have actually tried it since but did not obtain the same results. Perhaps I was a diseased youth? Lurvely.
(Wed 5th May 2004, 22:44, More)

» Local Nutters

I live near philadelphia, pa
Its hard to pick one nutter from there. Two personal favorites:

Naked woman on the corner: In broad daylight, on one of the busiest streets in south side. 10 AM. Fairly old, not the looker, and entirely motionless. People were just walking around her, pretending she wasn't there, including an officer of the law. I guess there is crazzier shite to deal with in philly.

Spike: favourite bum who is always saying, "HEY man, can I get a dolla to get summin to EAT?" in a charming loon voice. Claims to have been an up and coming boxer who's down on his luck. Forgets your face/name no matter how many times he introduces himself to you, even after you take him out to eat or give him dollars on a daily basis.
(Fri 17th Sep 2004, 0:31, More)