b3ta.com user burkymurk
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» Crazy Relatives

shit steppa
years back when there was always loadsa dog $h!t (even white) on the pavement, my grandad always walked along and go to tread in a nice fresh dogg slop, pretending he didnt notice it was there.

anyone he was with would start panic-warning him, he would'nt take notice, giving my mum a heart attach, but then at the last minute do a little side step.

i think it was more of a habit than a practical joke.

Oh yeah, another time he came round our house in summer.

he stayed in the car as we all made our way out back for a bbq.

next minute, we all hear a sound up on the roof.
looking up, the old git has only climbed over the house and is sitting there like a monkey!

he stayed there for a while and we just threw nuts up at him!
top notch, old boy
(Thu 5th Jul 2007, 22:07, More)

» Insults

a girl walking towards you and your mate......
"she's nice...from a far..."
she gets closer
"but far from nice.."

lame i know, it's more of an acknowledgement
(Mon 8th Oct 2007, 14:22, More)

» * PFFT *

oh yeah and...
fart = shit particles (airborne)

fact
(Fri 13th Jul 2007, 14:46, More)

» When Animals Attack

How long does this silly game
LAST
(Thu 1st May 2008, 14:59, More)

» Guilty Pleasures, part 2

long time no post
1. i love picking my nose.. (made it bleed earlier this year and has only just healed)

2. i love picking my bum.. (not bled yet :/)

3. when i have cold hands i alway put them on to unexpecting peoples flesh. like when you just arrive at the pub after a cold walk, going up to people (that you know!) and putting it on their neck stomach when not expecting...(im sure this didnt need explaining so fully)

4. i never ever ever was my mug at work, and havent doen so properly in the last 3 half yrs. The secretary washed it for me the other day tho when i was off, cos she was so disgusted by it. :)

sry for blabbing
(Fri 14th Mar 2008, 14:52, More)
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