» School Days

We were evil in 6th form...
When I was in 6th form, our classes were used as isolation rooms for the disruptive kids from lower years. Mostly upon being put into a room full of us they would sit down and shut up.
One guy sticks in my mind however. He would regularly end up in our physics lessons. On one occasion, Mr J (our teacher) had to go out of the room, leaving us, the isolation guy and a van de graafe generator in the room. Unsupervised.

I don't remember the exact chain of events, but it ended up with the isolation kid standing in a polystyrene box, touching the generator. For about 15 mins before Mr J came back. His reaction was classic.

Upon re-entering the room, he asked us 'How long has he been holding that for?'. Upon hearing the response, he asked the kid 'Do you know what that is?' When the kid claimed not to, he went and fetched his teacher from over the corridor, who promptly laughed at him, and explained his predicament and turned off the generator.

After the kid had been discharged, Mr J turned to us, and told us 'If we ever do that again, he will be discharged through you. But good work boys'.

I never saw that particular kid in our lessons in isolation again. I am also told that he couldn't feel his hand for most of the day.
(Wed 4th Feb 2009, 20:19, More)

» Pet Peeves

Night Club Peeves
I work in a nightclub and have a couple of peeves:
1. People who take their drinks into the toilets. WTF people? Those toilets are the scabbiest I have ever seen and yet when I do a toilet check, lo and behold for every gent at the urinal, there is a pint glass in front of him, on the topo of the urinal. Is it that hard to ask your mate "look after this for us would ya" when you go?

2. The female bar staff. When I am on the door, the bar staff come past me a lot. If they have a coat on, I can't see their uniform and don't always recognise them as staff. The men seem aware of this and will remove their jackets as they approach.
Do the women? Hell no. Instead they will wave their chest at me so that I have to stare at their breasts to confirm that they are wearing uniform and not just a black shirt with a logo. Unfortunately this means that any ladies with a logo in that position get me sneaking a look at their chest as they approach. Not all of them (read as none of them) understand why and I end up with dirty looks.

3. DJs who will not shut the fuck up! The lights are on, the bar has stopped serving and the DJ will not stop playing. There are two or three that are total bastards and we have to get the crew to just pull the plug on them to make them stop.
WE WANT TO GO HOME PEOPLE!

Anyway, apologies for length, the DJ wouldn't shut up!
(Sat 3rd May 2008, 22:25, More)