b3ta.com user jakedamusss
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Profile for jakedamusss:
Profile Info:

A retired deer slaughterman now working in Brisbane, Australia.

Ismashthingsinmysleepuruk-hai made this of a tattoo i have :)


Recent front page messages:


Best answers to questions:

» Waste of money

I bought a full size bear suit
One friday I decided it would be a great idea to try and drink my weight in cheap cask wine.
Sadly I failed and only drunk half of the required five litres, but oon the plus side i woke up the next day wondering what the hell I had been up to the night before. A quick check of my computer history tells me I was in ebay. It seems I had bought a full size mascot quality bear suit.

Why? Who the fuck knows?

Moral of the story?

Dont mix large amounts of cheap wine with the internet and credit cards.

Ill try and find pictures of it later on.

Edit :I tried to link to b3tards but it comes up mussave. sorry
(Tue 5th Oct 2010, 5:43, More)

» Filth!

Pee roast
My ex was a filth bag
I still shudder thinking about this.

I am, as most males fairly interested in licking the hairy clam.

So one night my then girlfriend gets home and we start down the path of hanky panky. Now at this stage i've forgotten that ive noticed the shower head hasnt been moved from where I so carfully put it three days in a row and head down south for some mouth love.
Cue me screwing my nose up and asking if she has washed lately? Shock horror, no she hasnt, but hops out of bed and grabs a mediwipe.

Im not sure which tasted worse, the three day old manky pussy or the lemon flavoured chemical minge I had a go at.

Needless to say we broke up not long after that.

Good riddance to bad rubbish!
(Fri 3rd Feb 2012, 5:43, More)

» The thing I've been most ashamed of doing with a penis

My Job
I work in a dounut factory....

"grabs hoodie"
(Mon 16th Mar 2009, 20:52, More)

» Vandalism

This is more vandalism theory than actual vandalism
I have an idea to get lot of different sized question marks in sticker form printed off and stick them on signs that dont need/warrent them.
Keep off the grass, Danger high voltage etc.

Just because
(Thu 14th Oct 2010, 4:03, More)

» Food sabotage

not so nice toffee
while waiting in the car for my mum so we could go around to her friends place i spied some toffee looking substance in a bowl so not wanting to miss out on some sneaky toffee i broke a chunk off and stuffed it in my gob.... lo and be hold after a few chews found out it wasnt toffee but wax for my mother to wax her and her friends legs!! guess the joke was on me. first post and i like it rough so dont be gentle...
(Wed 24th Sep 2008, 8:32, More)
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