b3ta.com user CakeCat
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» Have you ever seen a dead body?

Several years ago
My gran died when I was seven so we flew to Ireland for her funeral.
Her body was lying in the house so family and friends could say a final goodbye.
Lot's of candles round the place and it didn't really bother me as I didn't know her and she just looked asleep.

Apparantly my little cousin, after seeing all the candles burst in to a loud and enthusiastic rendition of "Happy Birthday."

Nobody had the heart to tell her to stop.
(Thu 28th Feb 2008, 21:24, More)

» Dumb things you've done

As a young(ish) child, I decided to climb under an electric fence to say hello to some cows in a field.

I get electrocuted by the fence so have to lie flat into the ground to prevent further shockiness.

This is when the cows start heading towards me.

Cows are scary.
(Tue 1st Jan 2008, 14:04, More)

» Evil Pranks

I was only a lass.
We were on a lovely sunny family walk in the country. It wasn't exactly a path, so we took a shortcut through a field of rather tall crops. I was about a foot shorter than the plants, (which were very densely planted so we had to wriggle our way though.

Family prattle on about crop circles and the likes (aliens were very scary at that age) so I became rather nervous as my only means of direction was following the sounds of their voices.
All goes quiet. I get scared and start whimpering to myself.
After a few minutes all three family members jump out from different angles, shouting at the top of their voice.
I go pale and clammy, and curl up in a foetal ball and need to be carried home.

Bastard family.
(Thu 13th Dec 2007, 21:58, More)

» Cheap Tat

My band friends and I take a great interest in Aldi.
Every Saturday we walk past this place of wonder to get to band rehearsals.

The game is to see how many cans of "RED THUNDER"* you can drink while remining conscious. Red thunder is the Red Bull substitute at only 29 pence a can!

It causes severe illness.

*The record is 6.
(Sat 5th Jan 2008, 18:19, More)

» Phobias

Why are you scaring me?

Little ginger freaks. They know I'm afraid. They make that horrible raspy noise with their mouths. You can't hide. They'll climb and get you. They are smart. They know how to get you.
(Fri 11th Apr 2008, 23:47, More)
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