» Phobias

Beads
A friend of mine has a rather bad phobia of beads. Which can be pretty fun for playing cruel practical jokes, the sort you play in the first year of university when marks don't count.

It starts small, such as throwing a necklace at person with phobia, or bracelet, and watch the sheer panic and terror as they leap up, and run round the room screaming hysterically,.

However, like all great works of art (or torture), the torment develops. Placing necklace or bracelet of beads on persons room door handle is always fun, then watching them trying to open the door without touching the dreaded, offensive material. However, they cannot buck up the courage to remove the bracelet, and so spend the night outside their room, on the floor, curled up, crying.

It's great being a heel.
(Thu 10th Apr 2008, 18:37, More)

» Stalked

accidental stalking
I notice that most of these stories are from people who have been stalked by really creepy blokes or girls....poo. Well this is not the best way to make a first impression but I was a stalker once, in fact being the little technophile that I am, I was a facebook stalker.

However, at the time it seemed like a perfectly logical idea. I’d noticed the girl whilst watching the F.A cup final in the Student’s Union of our University (after all, the game was a complete borfest for a neutral so what else was I supposed to do?) and a few days later decided to add her as a friend after spotting her on the network homepage thingymebob. Poking is just not my style; that’s not totally stupid enough.

Anyway she accepted and I decided to comment on her interests and make some jokes. A brilliant strategy I thought and it seemed to be working. She was friendly back and even asked me at one point whether I’d be out on Friday at the Student’s Union (been at a campus bubble uni that’s the only place really to go). So off I trotted, where I bottled it and dare not even say hello.

Unfortunately I bottled it again, and again and again; pretty much every time I saw her in social situations. However, I kept sending really pointless messages and wondering why the responses were getting fewer and farer between. It only started to twig that I should probably cut my losses and won when I saw her once, and she looked very warily at me. I wonder why? (I’d added her to messenger when drunk as well once….big sodding mistake!) Even then I still kept sending messages.

Well I carried this on for a few weeks, then realising how truly awfully deep the hole I was digging was, I decided to find a bit of common sense and give up. My last message was a totally great witty pun which I cannot imagine anyone ever using about her birthday being on Valentine’s Day and how that must have ruined the romance for her parents. Honestly, I don’t know how she could resist?

Sorry about the lack of laughs, but I suppose that is the moral of the story.
(Tue 5th Feb 2008, 10:33, More)