b3ta.com user bluemohawkz
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Too old for this shit, but at times it beats wankin'. An It keeps me from under the wife's feet.Don't live in Inglistan anymore but it's for the best I suppose.

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» Accidental innuendo

Not really innuendo. Racism at it's worst, but I paid for it
I was at a bike rally, the organisers had a tug of war competition, being of large stature (pleasantly portly) it was requested of me, that I be the anchor man (you know the big one at the back with the rope wrapped several times around him) We took up the slack and the gun was fired. The rope became as tight as the grip a Scotsman would make on a wayward two bob (10p in new money). After much straining,double ruptures,hernias,and stalemate I thought what can I say to move things along a bit? (after all my beer was warming up and time was getting on) So I said (and I am not proud,and it was not clever) COME ON YOU FUCKERS PULL IT LIKE YOU'RE PULLING A NIGGER OF YER SISTER. At that several of my chums fell down with laughter and I was catapulted over the bushes and landed in a pile of steaming cowshit....
(Thu 12th Jun 2008, 20:25, More)

» Advice from Old People

dad said "Never sit down with a lightbulb in yer back pocket"
(Sat 21st Jun 2008, 10:40, More)