b3ta.com user floella
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I'm going to be an aunty again!
this should be a picture of a baby!

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Best answers to questions:

» Schadenfreude

The snow reminds me of a story that would be perfect for this QoTW if my boyfriend was telling it. He's too busy though, so I will:

Last year, my loving boyfriend and I were near Alston, happily playing in the snow, until he threw a massive snowball that hit me right in the middle of my face.

Overriding my desire to cry and hide in the car, I made the biggest snowball my girly hands could carry and chased off to get my revenge. CALAMITY! So preoccupied was I with my vicious vendetta that I failed to observe the slidiness of this patch of mud, and instead of exacting revenge on the evil beast, I flipped, comic-book style, into the cold sludge.

Luckily for you, he thoughtfully recorded the aftermath in a series of flattering photographs, whilst laughing till he wheezed and the tears froze solid on his cheeks. Filthy, and freezing, and banned from the car, I got undressed at the side of the road, using bits of rubbish from the boot as wellies. I eventually removed enough of the sludge for him let me in whilst he took photos of me looking like a swamp creature and poked my bruises.
(Thu 17th Dec 2009, 17:32, More)

» The Dark

In my sleep...
I apparently often talk, move, shout...

My ex waited 6 weeks before telling me that the random scratches appearing on his face during the night were (mainly) caused by me.

Yesterday my (current) boyfriend informed me that the night before, I'd woken him up, writhing around and kicking the covers. He'd asked me if I was ok and what was going on, to which I replied:
"We're having a fight! And I'm winning!" before smacking him in the face.
(Sun 26th Jul 2009, 16:39, More)

» Eccentrics

I was attending a residential week-long workshop on Circus Skills when I made friends with a batty fellow called Darryl. During a tiring juggling lesson, he told me about how he owns his own taxidermy business, based near Ormskirk. He's stuffed all kinds of creatures, from badgers to pet cats in a variety of wacky poses. He lived in quite a modest house but it had a large garden and he kept chickens, mainly for eggs, but over time they became like pets to him. One day, one of the chicks died, and by way of grief-relieving therapy he decided to stuff it and keep it as a monument to a much-loved bird. I think there may have been a virus to blame as shortly afterwards, two more of the chicks died, so he stuffed them as well.

He called me up and asked me to go and see him, and given his recent losses, I decided to be a good friend, and go and visit. When I arrived at his house I found him practising his juggling. With the stuffed chickens...

"Check this out!" he gleefully shouted, "I am perfecting my ex-hen tricks!"
(Sat 1st Nov 2008, 19:53, More)

» Helicopter Parents

I wish...
my parents were helicopter parents. When I started to learn how to walk my dad suggested putting up stair gates. My mum's reply was "Oh no! Let her fall down once and she'll never do it again".
(Sun 13th Sep 2009, 10:34, More)