b3ta.com user Sivvus
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Profile for Sivvus:
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Has been a shameless lurker for two years and will probably remain so... also has two X chromosomes.

My DA account is http:///sivvus.deviantart.com

This isn't what I look like, but at least it has the right number of limbs:

I also like tea.

And my drawings are always sooo original. Good thing I'm more of a QOTW'er than an image person, right?

Recent front page messages:


Best answers to questions:

» The Police II

Plain Clothes Officer
My uncle bikes to his station in his bike leathers each day and gets changed into uniform when he's there.

A few weeks ago he had to spend the whole day in plain clothes because his two year old daughter had gone through his rucksack, hidden his uniform and replaced it with a pair of pink dungarees and her fluffy sweater. When questioned about this, she claimed she wanted 'daddy to look pretty at work'.
(Thu 5th May 2011, 19:22, More)

» Unexpected Nudity

A friend
invited me around for a Chinese the other night.

Unexpected Noodle tea!
(Thu 28th May 2009, 14:22, More)

» Failed Projects

I was 4. He was 5. Don't judge us.
One day, little Sivvus woke up very early and fancied banana custard for breakfast. Her big brother was awake too, and said, "Okay! There are bananas!"

Little Sivvus and her brother went into the kitchen and cut up the bananas using a blunt knife, because mummy would be very angry if they used a sharp knife! After the bananas were all cut up, little Sivvus asked her brother, "How do we make custard?"

"I've seen mummy do it. I think she uses this." Her brother said, taking down a tub of cornflower. They emptied the cornflower into a mixing bowl and added 4 liters of milk and stirred it, and stirred it, until it was slightly less lumpy.

"Isn't it supposed to be yellow?" Little Sivvus wondered, tasting the gloop. Her brother nodded. "What's yellow?"

Little Sivvus thought for a while. "Why don't you pee in it, then it'd be yellow!" She said.

Twenty minutes later mummy came downstairs. There was a yellow bowlful of cornflower paste on the table, handprints everywhere, and a nasty smell. The children were nowhere to be seen.

And that, boys and girls, is why Sivvus doesn't make custard.
(Thu 3rd Dec 2009, 19:17, More)

» Made me laugh

My grandpa teases his (toddler age) grandkids
with the whole "Got your nose!" thing. The end of the game will always be him tapping the kid's nose- it's still there! what a shock! - and going, "Dink!"

My 4 year old cousin had apparently had enough of this game when she waited for grandpa to fall asleep, snuck up on him, punched him full in the nose shouting "DINNNNK!" at the top of her voice, and legged it laughing maniacally.
(Thu 6th Dec 2012, 22:31, More)

» Devastating Put-Downs

Someone I know
Got chased through a field by a flock of sheep. Vaulted over the fence, and then stood there yelling back at them, "What do you think you're doing? I'm a vegetarian!"
(Fri 25th Nov 2011, 12:24, More)
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