Profile for orangejuicejohns:
I currently live in HK.
I love reading and would like to write a book one day. Cooking is great fun, eating is nearly as good.
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- a member for 15 years, 7 months and 28 days
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- has posted 3 stories and 14 replies on question of the week
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I currently live in HK.
I love reading and would like to write a book one day. Cooking is great fun, eating is nearly as good.
Recent front page messages:
none
Best answers to questions:
» Cringe!
cream and cringe
Me, 16yrs old and had just had a shag in a jacuzzi and she kept her bikini bottoms on.
This left me with a rather sore/sensitive sensation that grew into a chilli burning type of pants rage by the time I had cycled home.
Decided to take a shower and check myself out.
Blister, down one side of my man part, about an inch and a half in length and already filled with fluid (the blister). The surrounding skin was red and angry looking, the pain was intense and burn like. I needed to do something, fast.
Scanning the bathroom cabinet, I was not surprised to find that we were all out of 'serious cock burn cream' but we did have aftersun, the label waffled on about skin repair, so I thought I was onto a winner!
Our house hold was a serious/ morose type headed by the classic 'out of step with reality' victorian dad, who at that moment , wanted to use the bathroom, he knocked (you always have to knock) and made it clear I was to GTF out ASAP as he wanted to use HIS bathroom...
So I pocketed the solution (pun) to my problem and went to my bedroom to apply the 'solution' to my 'problem' ...
So, Im standing there, trousers and pants around my ankles, my top held clear of the area, tucked under my chin. My hips pushed out to make the best of the light, a big white dollop of solution in my right hand, my nob resting in my left hand, I am seconds, maybe milliseconds away from blister relief when dad walks straight in, moving fast, talking, head down.
He looks up, sees my face, looks down, turns around sharpish and leaves, his sentence trailing off....
The joy of the pain relief was outdone by the *cringe*
He thought he'd just caught me having a creamy wank.
Having to walk out of my room into the lounge and face the ole man was.... difficult to say the least.
No eye contact for at least a week.
I am cringing now, and there are sooooo many more *cringes* in my life...
(Sat 29th Nov 2008, 9:20, More)
cream and cringe
Me, 16yrs old and had just had a shag in a jacuzzi and she kept her bikini bottoms on.
This left me with a rather sore/sensitive sensation that grew into a chilli burning type of pants rage by the time I had cycled home.
Decided to take a shower and check myself out.
Blister, down one side of my man part, about an inch and a half in length and already filled with fluid (the blister). The surrounding skin was red and angry looking, the pain was intense and burn like. I needed to do something, fast.
Scanning the bathroom cabinet, I was not surprised to find that we were all out of 'serious cock burn cream' but we did have aftersun, the label waffled on about skin repair, so I thought I was onto a winner!
Our house hold was a serious/ morose type headed by the classic 'out of step with reality' victorian dad, who at that moment , wanted to use the bathroom, he knocked (you always have to knock) and made it clear I was to GTF out ASAP as he wanted to use HIS bathroom...
So I pocketed the solution (pun) to my problem and went to my bedroom to apply the 'solution' to my 'problem' ...
So, Im standing there, trousers and pants around my ankles, my top held clear of the area, tucked under my chin. My hips pushed out to make the best of the light, a big white dollop of solution in my right hand, my nob resting in my left hand, I am seconds, maybe milliseconds away from blister relief when dad walks straight in, moving fast, talking, head down.
He looks up, sees my face, looks down, turns around sharpish and leaves, his sentence trailing off....
The joy of the pain relief was outdone by the *cringe*
He thought he'd just caught me having a creamy wank.
Having to walk out of my room into the lounge and face the ole man was.... difficult to say the least.
No eye contact for at least a week.
I am cringing now, and there are sooooo many more *cringes* in my life...
(Sat 29th Nov 2008, 9:20, More)
» My sex misconceptions
Two Stories
I got interested in girls at 10 years old.
There was a plump girl in my class with reasonably sized breasts (for a 10 yr old) and she was keen on me, so we arranged a date at break time and my mate agreed to keep watch while we did 'stuff' in the store room.
We meet, we kiss, I ask if I can grope, thats fine, I grope and I am flabergasted by their size and beauty...... so much so that I can't contain my joy and want to share it with my friend keeping watch....
Andy Andy!! come here and look at these!! "they're MASSIVE!" he was equally impressed, she was (a little embarrassed) proud of them and the attention (I like to kid myself)
We continued on the bus o the way home, only this time I was going 'downstairs'
I didn't know about pubes at 10yrs old so when I found a single curly black hair in the way, it seemed natural to just pull it off, she wasn't too happy about that either.
Still, a week later I had built a 'den' near a pond mid way between our houses, this was a place where we could have our first sex. Times and dates were arranged.
I was early, gelled hair, shiny BMX. She arrived looking as gorgeous as a 10yr old can and was impressed with my construction skills... we settled down, got naked, I lay on her.....
I thought we were having sex.
I thought, is this what all the fuss is about???? this is....... rubbish!
It took me a further year of 'research' to discover you had to put it 'inside' ...... and another 4yrs to get laid!
Whenever I bump into my mate who kept watch, the conversation always turns to that day.....'do you remember how big they were? oh yes, they were massive, esp for a 10yr old!!
* Also, when I was 13, I was told that as the oldest son I had certain responsibilities, in the event of my fathers death, I would inherit the family bible, I must provide for the family and I must destroy a certain black bag and its contents, located in the bottom of the wardrobe, without looking at its contents. Obviously the next time they went out to dinner I was straight in there. Some clothes, 3 wigs, never knew mum wore those, at the bottom , some vids...
3 mins later the curtains are drawn, front and back doors double locked, vid playing, me watching 'actress' undressing......... all going well, she is gorgeous and I'm excited, camera pans down her slim athletic body, across the toned legs (I'm very excited now, I'm about to see in full colour a moving/living silky wet purse)
Camera pans back up the other tanned leg...I'm about to burst when into shot comes a very large / ugly (unexpected) man cock.
A man cock on a beautiful woman?
This was completely new to me, was this a new crossed breed? I'm I gay, was it a man or woman or what....
"Sorry for the length"
(Sat 27th Sep 2008, 7:46, More)
Two Stories
I got interested in girls at 10 years old.
There was a plump girl in my class with reasonably sized breasts (for a 10 yr old) and she was keen on me, so we arranged a date at break time and my mate agreed to keep watch while we did 'stuff' in the store room.
We meet, we kiss, I ask if I can grope, thats fine, I grope and I am flabergasted by their size and beauty...... so much so that I can't contain my joy and want to share it with my friend keeping watch....
Andy Andy!! come here and look at these!! "they're MASSIVE!" he was equally impressed, she was (a little embarrassed) proud of them and the attention (I like to kid myself)
We continued on the bus o the way home, only this time I was going 'downstairs'
I didn't know about pubes at 10yrs old so when I found a single curly black hair in the way, it seemed natural to just pull it off, she wasn't too happy about that either.
Still, a week later I had built a 'den' near a pond mid way between our houses, this was a place where we could have our first sex. Times and dates were arranged.
I was early, gelled hair, shiny BMX. She arrived looking as gorgeous as a 10yr old can and was impressed with my construction skills... we settled down, got naked, I lay on her.....
I thought we were having sex.
I thought, is this what all the fuss is about???? this is....... rubbish!
It took me a further year of 'research' to discover you had to put it 'inside' ...... and another 4yrs to get laid!
Whenever I bump into my mate who kept watch, the conversation always turns to that day.....'do you remember how big they were? oh yes, they were massive, esp for a 10yr old!!
* Also, when I was 13, I was told that as the oldest son I had certain responsibilities, in the event of my fathers death, I would inherit the family bible, I must provide for the family and I must destroy a certain black bag and its contents, located in the bottom of the wardrobe, without looking at its contents. Obviously the next time they went out to dinner I was straight in there. Some clothes, 3 wigs, never knew mum wore those, at the bottom , some vids...
3 mins later the curtains are drawn, front and back doors double locked, vid playing, me watching 'actress' undressing......... all going well, she is gorgeous and I'm excited, camera pans down her slim athletic body, across the toned legs (I'm very excited now, I'm about to see in full colour a moving/living silky wet purse)
Camera pans back up the other tanned leg...I'm about to burst when into shot comes a very large / ugly (unexpected) man cock.
A man cock on a beautiful woman?
This was completely new to me, was this a new crossed breed? I'm I gay, was it a man or woman or what....
"Sorry for the length"
(Sat 27th Sep 2008, 7:46, More)
» Cringe!
sleep/pissed walking
when my best mate moved up to london from our post uni digs, I threw a HUGE party/send off type of affair. Drinks, smokes, little fellas etc.
(great party 6am finish, I wandered around the house making sure we were 'secure' and chuckled to my self, "Im the last man standing, again!"
Woke up by being kicked by my best mate who said...
"WTF are you doing in my bed?"
Giggles.
I'd gone to bed, fallen asleep, woken up, left jeans and socks at bottom of the stairs, trekked upstairs into his room and gone to sleep top/tailing..
*he still takes the piss :)
(Sat 29th Nov 2008, 8:46, More)
sleep/pissed walking
when my best mate moved up to london from our post uni digs, I threw a HUGE party/send off type of affair. Drinks, smokes, little fellas etc.
(great party 6am finish, I wandered around the house making sure we were 'secure' and chuckled to my self, "Im the last man standing, again!"
Woke up by being kicked by my best mate who said...
"WTF are you doing in my bed?"
Giggles.
I'd gone to bed, fallen asleep, woken up, left jeans and socks at bottom of the stairs, trekked upstairs into his room and gone to sleep top/tailing..
*he still takes the piss :)
(Sat 29th Nov 2008, 8:46, More)