b3ta.com user MrGomez
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Ok 5 facts!....here we go.

I'm a film-maker, and I'm lucky enough to make a living off it.

I once met Tim Westwood, and wanted to have a massive gangster face off, but he was really polite, and i was gutted.

I can't tell the difference between Bob Monkhouse and Des O'Connor, even after one of them DIED.

I come from near Liverpool, but not a scouser liiike.

There are lots of b3tards that make me smile and this place is just fantastic....

This is me....

This is me when i was 16 and thought i was Peter Gabriel.

Yes i put a counter here, forgive me, i wanted to see how many of you hooligans actually look at this.


Recent front page messages:

*wanders over from links*

*shuffles back*
(Fri 4th Jan 2008, 14:31, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Why should you be fired from your job?

I work from home for myself
So the freedom to do amazingly in-appropriate things is too far too tempting.

Apart from spending the entire working day naked, or speaking to customers whilst having a shit, i excelled this week by opening up all the mail and trying each envelope on as a hat one by one. It took half an hour and it was completely worth it.

(and if you're stuck for a balaclava, A4 brown envelopes with the see-through window is perfect)
(Tue 14th Aug 2007, 23:28, More)

» My most gullible moment

I used to work in a well known cinema in Manchester...
Christopher Eccleston regularly came in to watch films on his own.

I don't follow celebrity land, and have never watched Doctor Who, so I didn't know who the hell Christopher Eccleston was.

As he approached the box office, one person said "Oh look who it is"...

I said "Who is it?"

Sensing my ignorance to this famous actor, the manager quick as a flash replied.

"Oh it's Chris, it's his first day, he has special needs. Will you show him around?"

Being a kind hearted citizen, I then proceeded to talk to Christopher Eccleston like a 5 year old and try to usher him towards the staff room. With the words "Special Needs" on the brain, I even went so far as to stop him when he tried to get away.

I soon realized he wasn't so special needs when he told ME to fuck off and stop acting like a spaz.

Well he looks a BIT special needs.
(Fri 22nd Aug 2008, 11:24, More)

» Work Experience

I worked in a place that put old cine reels onto DVD for people who couldn't watch them back anymore. My job was to digitally enhance them and do all the fancy jazz stuff with menu's and crap.

And here's the interesting statistic, 7 times out of 10, the Cine Reels were entirely made up of men in the 70's who filmed themselves tossing off.

After 8 hours of that, my mind was actually broken and everything was ruined forever. And i was only on £3p/h!
(Thu 10th May 2007, 11:09, More)

» Unexpected Nudity

Hot Asian 4U
I was filming a very low budget advert for a clothes company in London and the client had put us up in a suitably low budget hotel for a couple of nights. Me and the crew all sharing one uncomfortably small room.

We dumped our bags off in our room and complained about how small it was before leaving for the days shoot. The staff didn't seem to care until the producer said we were shooting a film to raise money for dying children...(what!)

They seemed to change their tune for a moment.

After a 12 hour days filming we returned deep into the night after a quick beer. The rest of the crew stayed in reception to see if we could change rooms, whilst I went straight to the room to have a piss.

As i turned the key in the lock and opened the door, even in the dark i saw my bag wasn't where i left it. I turned the light on to look further....revealing the sight of a middle aged chinese man sat upright in bed having one of the most furious wanks i've ever seen. What made it worse was he didn't even stop when we made eye contact for a couple of seconds.

I backed out of the room. Locked the door and we never said a word.

Back in reception. "Good news, they've switched us to a new room"

"I know i found out"


"I've just found Mr. Miyagi knockin one out on your bed"
(Thu 28th May 2009, 17:16, More)

» Pathological Liars

My brother and sister....
are quite older than me...they used to tell me I was in "Grange Hill" as a baby.

These lies built up and up until I found my self acting like a minor celebrity in school. My bubble was burst however when I started recalling hilarious anecdotes from "on set".....Only to be reminded "but you were a baby though...how do you remember it?"

Ahhh....the bastards made me believe their lie and then spawn more lies on my own!

(They also told me that cats could once fly)
(Thu 29th Nov 2007, 18:36, More)
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