b3ta.com user Smysha
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» Losing it

Complete and utter paranoia
Hello all and welcome to my first post. :)

From February to, well, only very recently, I've been convinced that someone is following me. I would leave the house and get to the train station. I'd wait at the platform for a few trains to go past to make sure that noone was spying on me. Sometimes I'd jump off at random stations and do the same thing before completing my journey. I'd take elaborate, long-winding routes to the station to make sure that nobody was following me. Towards the end I used to pack a rucksack with me. In that rucksack I'd have another change of clothes, another coat, another pair of shoes and, more importantly, another rucksack. I'd leave the house, go to a busy public toilet, swap everything around, leave the building by another door, go to the station and get on the train. Then I'd change it all around on the way home. This often left me struggling to hold back tears in public. The thing is I was convinced that someone was spying on me and despite all of my precautions they were winning and I was losing. I can't describe the sense of utter helplessness I'd feel and still often feel. The fear. I really thought I was going to lose it.

Why did I think someone was following me? Well just before Christmas somebody did hire a private detective to follow me. The consequences of what the private detective gave to his client has totally destroyed my life, my happiness and all sorts of other good things.

Yeah, I'm getting better. Oh, and don't worry. I didn't do anything illegal or dangerous nor was I cheating on my spouse. I don't have a spouse to cheat on. :)
(Thu 28th Jul 2011, 1:21, More)

» Tactless

Another one!
It was about two to three years ago and Liverpool had just lost a game that we really shouldn't have lost. Later that evening I was explaining to a friend how gutted I was feeling and described it to being like having a distant relative - like an uncle you used to love as a kid but lost touch with - pass away. 'Yeah, my uncle passed away yesterday. I'm not sure how to feel about it because I remember a lot of the good times we had when I was younger then he and my dad had a fight.' 'What? Are you serious? You're just shitting me right?' 'No, he really did pass away.'

So my first bit of super twattish behaviour was describing losing a football match to losing a relative. How shite is that? Then the second bit was when I questioned his sincerity. ¬_¬
(Sat 5th Nov 2011, 17:57, More)

» Tactless

Taking out the rubbish in my sister's house.
There were a LOT of bin bags because there were tonnes of people who had stayed over for the past two evenings. My sister's next door neighbour jokes, 'Wow, what have you got in there? A dead body?' 'No, there is a lot of family over as my son passed away a couple of days ago. I've been wondering how to tell you lot actually.' The guy just fled muttering apologies and didn't see my sister smile at his embarrassment.
(Sat 5th Nov 2011, 17:43, More)

» No Self-Awareness

I've recently left the cozy walls of education and am trying to do something about being unemployed. So I'm applying all over the place including in the delightful USA. In TWO interviews I was told that I spelt quite a few words wrong. It's obvious I'm from the UK. Firstly it says so, secondly my accent is a dead give away, thirdly everything I have done in my life is based in the UK. The entire world is aware that American English is different from all other Englishes SO WHY AREN'T YOU??

I was told by a friend to change it to American English as most people would assume I can't spell and am therefore a complete retard and then throw my CV away. :(
(Wed 5th Dec 2012, 21:47, More)