b3ta.com user mikey2gorgeous4u
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» Lead Balloon

Impressing Ben Elton
1983 - the heyday of 'alternative' comedy (based on storytelling not punchlines) and I go to the Winter Gardens in Bournemouth to see Ryk Mayall, Ben Elton and Andy De La Tour on their national tour. After the gig, my friend Richard (we've had to call him 'Ryk' ever since!) wanted to get Mr Mayall's autograph as did many others and we went backstage where he joined the queue. Not being so enamoured I found myself standing against a wall next to Messrs Elton and DeLaTour.
Well, what an opportunity! I had only recently heard what I considered to be a BRILLIANT joke. Made me chortle and was my current favourite. So I started to tell it to my new best mate Ben.
Now... although I was 18, I was VERY naive! I didn't even realise that Mr Elton was of Jewish descent. The joke consisted of some Jewish gentlemen discovering a German tank in the desert and one-by-one dying of exhaustion in an attempt to push it to a scrapyard to get some money for it. I must admit the punchline (head pops out of turret, looks around and says into the tank "Hey Hans I think we've run out of Jews") didn't go down very well.
After a few seconds of awkward silence B.E. turns to me, says "I don't do jokes" then walks off.
I don't to this day really know if he was being honest, utterly offended or whether he was just pissed off because no-one was queueing for his autograph.
(Wed 28th Aug 2013, 10:42, More)

» Fancy Dress Failures Pt 2

Halloween costume last year...
imgur.com/E4p51Rz
(Fri 1st Nov 2013, 14:23, More)