b3ta.com user R2Dtard
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Alladeen Madafakars

(Wed 28th Oct 2020, 3:04, More)

taste the rainbow!

(Mon 28th Jan 2019, 18:31, More)

just this

(Tue 13th Nov 2018, 15:24, More)

probz bindun

(Tue 30th Oct 2018, 1:50, More)

have i missed the bandwagon?

(Fri 5th Oct 2018, 10:55, More)

a little late to the party with the balloon gifs but anyways.....

***click for larger version
(Wed 8th Aug 2018, 15:19, More)

hitler trump gif i posted an earlier version of... earlier, this one has less mc hammer
this one has less mc hammer
(Tue 31st Jul 2018, 16:38, More)

what are you gonna do.. charge me for smoking? Wahoo FP! in your face losers.. (but thanks)
if ya no what i mean..

(Tue 17th Jul 2018, 14:33, More)

gonna need a bigger shark...

(Tue 27th Mar 2018, 13:51, More)

must get hot in that suit!

(Sun 4th Mar 2018, 15:07, More)

(Sat 27th May 2017, 13:39, More)

to pay KGB or not to pay KGB? that is the question..
or if a prostitute pisses in the ritz and the presidents not there to pay her, can you book it to room service?

(Wed 11th Jan 2017, 19:41, More)

(Fri 18th Sep 2015, 11:35, More)

everyone loves a pony
or stingray

(Thu 16th Apr 2015, 14:27, More)


(Tue 30th Dec 2014, 12:57, More)

shocking before and after pics

(Sun 28th Dec 2014, 23:41, More)

Best answers to questions:

» Halloween

my mrs and I moved into a rental house few years ago
which was creepy weird in quite a few ways, but it suited us in many ways and was in a great area between huge mansions etc, and the rent was a bargain, i had friends living within 2 blocks of us paying 3 times what we paid for a 1 bedroom bedsit, but we got a 5 bedroom house with huge yard and garage. ok the place had a lot of things that normally would have been fixed up if requested by tenants but we had a kind of agreement with the landlord that if i maintained the place and didnt need anything fixed, the rent would stay the same. my mrs was in the backyard one day digging a plot for a vegetable garden
when she freaked out and came running inside.. she had found bones in the ground that looked like they were hacked up and burnt with clothes attached to them, so i went out and sure enough.. bones.. human.. jaw bones with teeth, pelvis, spine.. so we moved the veggie garden elsewhere, kept our mouths shut and reburied them. like i said it was really great rent and we didnt want to run the risk of police knocking down the house to dig up the yard..
(Wed 28th Oct 2015, 20:41, More)

» Family Scandals

my grandfather on my mothers side was a mean and abusive drunk
Word came that he was in hospital and didnt have much time left, so we jumped in the car and drove 10 hours straight to get there before the old bastard passed away. We got there just in time, and he was conscious but confused as to who we were, after a few minutes the penny dropped and he seemed to perk up a little, then he ushers us all in closer with some urgency, obviously wanting to get something important off his chest with his last dying breaths,
so as we leaned over him on his hospital bed, 10 year old me eager to hear whatever pearls of wisdom he should offer up - he said this...

"There are niggers in this hospital that think they are doctors, and nip whores that think they are nurses" content with that, his eyes shut, and he was gone. completely true story.

R.I.P. Racist In Peace grandpappy!

(Wed 7th Jun 2017, 3:15, More)

» Weddings Part II

Can I just point out that the Question of the Week needs a little editing,
please change 'Tell us more of your wedding stories.' into a question..thanks!

So anyway I used to work with this greek bloke in a call centre, he was one of the funniest cunts I have ever worked with, having been forced to apologize to a coworker after she filed a complaint for compo because he told her she dressed like a slut, he went into the cubicle office thing with the higher ups and mediators etc, and loud enough so the entire floor could hear it stated "Joanna, i am sincerely sorry that you dress like a slut". Anyway he would get phonecalls from this greek girl two or three times a day, every day, for a year or so, and during every single phone call he would put the phone on speaker every few minutess and we could hear her using every tactic she could think of to get him to marry her, and every single phone call 2 or 3 times a day for a year, whilst she was on speaker phone begging for marriage he would mute the phone and tell the entire floor 'no way, never gonna happen' 'listen to how desperate she is.. its quite sad really, I only fucked her once and afterwards told her it was the worst sex I'd ever had' and 'what do I have to tell this girl to make her stop, not in a million years'. Anyway this whole time he had court cases pending relating to some major credit fraud he had committed at a bank where he worked previously, and upon being sentenced to 2 years in prison, we all got invited to the big greek wedding, which would easily have cost her parents over a hundred grand. At the reception of which the bride caught him doing lines of coke in the toilets whilst getting a blowjob by one of the guests she had invited..
(Thu 6th Nov 2014, 15:16, More)

» Homemade Booze

I not long ago ran into an old mate who I don't see a lot of any more, mostly because he's a veteran I.V. druggie and I'm too old for that shit these days.
So anyway I could tell before he even opened his mouth that he was in a 'fuckin good place' so to speak, and mentioned this to him... apparently as he was hard up a few days short of payday, he had sponged down the interior of his car roof upholstery, which was lined with 15 years worth of the tiny bit that squirts out when they flick it and squirt to get rid of air bubbles, coke, speed, smack, e, and fuck knows what else, reckons he'd been going hard on it for 2 or 3 days and still had more than half left. Talk about people doing fucked up shit to get a fix..
(Tue 9th Dec 2014, 7:38, More)

» I'm Sorry I've Written A Joke

Which World Leader Current or Past, has the biggest genitals?
China's Previous President.. Hu Jintao (Huge Endow)
(Sat 25th Aug 2018, 22:34, More)
[read all their answers]