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# You moistly come out at night. Moistly
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 0:55, archived)
# Slithering chthonically, the crepuscular miasma bubbling, hissing and wheezing beneath the foetid horror of my bulbous appengages, half-tentacle, half-unknown, unwelcome thing, that no witness, sane or otherwise, would ever speak of.
Y'mean that, yeah?
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:04, archived)
# and how!
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:04, archived)
# is that from jordan's exclusive magazine called 'Katie' that i saw in WHsmiths today?
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:06, archived)
# Bah! You rumbled me.
OK, I plead guilty of being its Deputy Editor.
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:09, archived)
# how dare you steal life stories from such a talented word-smith as Katie!
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:13, archived)
# Hey, I'm just sat there with a notepad, jotting down my employer's words.
And tarting 'em up a bit for public consumption.
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:17, archived)
# She's tarted up as far as she can go! I cannae tart nae more, cap'n!
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:19, archived)
# the bairns! thae cannae take it!
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:20, archived)
# Fuck the bairns.
There's a commercial imperative here.

*is still waiting for his £50*
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:27, archived)
# it's only money man
it's not like it can buy you love

or larger breasts
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:29, archived)
# Oh, I dunno.
£50 worth of doner meat, consumed over a month or so, might increase the size of my breasts considerably.
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:35, archived)
# Or you could just stuff your bra with kebab meat.
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:42, archived)
# It's not like I haven't tried.
But it's the stink, y'see. Everybody just seems to know, almost instinctively, that I'm a bloke.
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:48, archived)
# >.<
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:13, archived)
# TOO MUCH FUCK!
:-D
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:14, archived)
# hang on...
I just realised something horrific about this image

:D
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:14, archived)
# Be quick - im getting bored, and might be going to bed in about 10 mins...
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:15, archived)
# with a simple modification to the head
it's a rear view image

with all the... appropriate arm placement horror
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:17, archived)
# GOATSARUUUUUUU DESU!
And with that wondrous thought, im off tae sleepyland. Nart clarts. See you in the morn for fleas and birthday vectors.
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:20, archived)
# now there is an image, most horrifying
nnitenite
(, Sat 24 Sep 2011, 1:21, archived)