It's a corporate outrage!I've just discovered that Maynards, evil purveyors of limp-wristed soft wine gums for ponces, have bought out Lions, makers of fine, rock-hard jellies for men:
And what's the first thing they do having got their rapacious mitts on Lions? They change the black ones from lovely licquorice to bloody blackcurrant flavour. You can just see the focus group, can't you? 'Ooooh, as a screaming ponce I find the black ones a bit much; if only they tasted of a child's soft drink I'd be much happier la la la' and some imbicile in a suit nodding and making a mark on a clipboard. IT'S AN OUTRAGE! And the worst of it? Where was the media coverage of this takeover? If some company making plastic weevil-collars merges with another company making the holes for washers then bloody Declan Curry's banging on about it for weeks. Look at all the fuss over sodding Rover - a fourth-rate maker of crappy cars stuck in the 1940s and watching the news you'd think the Martians had landed or something. But when a British company that makes something truely great gets taken over, not a blimmin' peep! I ask you, what's this country coming to? Eh? EH?
It'll be American footballs and ice hockey pucks in the Sports Mixture next, mark my words.
(And what's the first thing they do having got their rapacious mitts on Lions? They change the black ones from lovely licquorice to bloody blackcurrant flavour. You can just see the focus group, can't you? 'Ooooh, as a screaming ponce I find the black ones a bit much; if only they tasted of a child's soft drink I'd be much happier la la la' and some imbicile in a suit nodding and making a mark on a clipboard. IT'S AN OUTRAGE! And the worst of it? Where was the media coverage of this takeover? If some company making plastic weevil-collars merges with another company making the holes for washers then bloody Declan Curry's banging on about it for weeks. Look at all the fuss over sodding Rover - a fourth-rate maker of crappy cars stuck in the 1940s and watching the news you'd think the Martians had landed or something. But when a British company that makes something truely great gets taken over, not a blimmin' peep! I ask you, what's this country coming to? Eh? EH?
It'll be American footballs and ice hockey pucks in the Sports Mixture next, mark my words.
Olembe Refuses to write in this space,
Fri 26 Aug 2005, 12:50,
archived)
waaaah mummy!!....words and stuff
prodigy69 broke b3ta and made everyone leave,
Fri 26 Aug 2005, 12:51,
archived)
aren't they the vile ones which taste of noxious chemicals?
monstrinho do biscoito teeeshurts = www.nogunarmy.com,
Fri 26 Aug 2005, 12:51,
archived)
Yeahbut licquorice is 'orrible.
(
DigitalJim dishwasher & microwave safe,
Fri 26 Aug 2005, 12:57,
archived)
I can;t enjoy my foodunless you commment :(
www.b3ta.com/board/5051579
(www.b3ta.com/board/5051579
Redsushi! Whoop! Whoop! Yes, that one!,
Fri 26 Aug 2005, 12:58,
archived)
Licquorice is fucking horridwhen combined with jelly sweets.
Licquorice has place in allsorts or sherbet fountains, not jelly gum things.
(Licquorice has place in allsorts or sherbet fountains, not jelly gum things.
Comma,
Fri 26 Aug 2005, 12:53,
archived)
HA!That was you on the focus group, and I claim my five pounds.
( Olembe Refuses to write in this space,
Fri 26 Aug 2005, 12:54,
archived)
"That was a higly articulate outburst Vivian...I just hope they're not watching!"
(
Zank Frappa Who let the lefties in?,
Fri 26 Aug 2005, 12:53,
archived)
I agreei always loved the black ones :(
Isn't Pruple the traditional colour for Blackcurrant? IT'S AN OUTRAGE!
(Isn't Pruple the traditional colour for Blackcurrant? IT'S AN OUTRAGE!
Snorty McBumhole YouTube.com/MinistryOfGeeks,
Fri 26 Aug 2005, 12:55,
archived)
It's weirdthe colours that sweet companies make us believe fruits are.
Also, the flavours are a bit off, too: ever tasted a banana that in any way resembles banana milkshake?
(Also, the flavours are a bit off, too: ever tasted a banana that in any way resembles banana milkshake?
DigitalJim dishwasher & microwave safe,
Fri 26 Aug 2005, 13:00,
archived)
Banana milkshake flavour is a very special flavour.it's how bananas ought to taste.
(,
Fri 26 Aug 2005, 13:07,
archived)
the Swedes have some licorice that will make your toes curl
Purple Onion,
Fri 26 Aug 2005, 12:59,
archived)
Salty as hellIt'll rip your tongue apart. And quite addictive.
( Bananiel,
Fri 26 Aug 2005, 13:12,
archived)
Not reallyI use both. Or used, until i got married...
my wife wouldn't kiss me when I had a mouth full of tobacco and soda
(my wife wouldn't kiss me when I had a mouth full of tobacco and soda
Bananiel,
Fri 26 Aug 2005, 13:21,
archived)
