Cheap TatOneEyedMonster remindes us about the crap you can buy in pound shops: "Batteries that lasted about an hour and then died. A screwdriver with a loose handle so I couldn't turn the damn screw, and a tape measure which wasn't at all accurate."
Similarly, my neighbour bought a lawnmower from Argos that was so cheap the wheels didn't go round, it sort of skidded over the grass whilst gently back-combing it.
What's the cheapest, most useless crap you've bought?
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chthonic, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 7:26)
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Cheap tat...on SaleI've just got back from town. I like to get out of the office every day at lunchtime, just to clear my head if nothing else - though there's usually some errand to run, or a nice bench to sit on, a book to read, some lunch to eat - but it was wet so I just trudged around town, down one way up the other.
It was outside a shoe shop. There was a woman or young lady, couldn't tell which, bending forward to look at some shoes (I summised) which were on sale (that's the tat by the way). She had on a short jacket, a scarf and a hat and tight jeans with almost knee-length boots...
Is it just me guys or do you ever get an almost insurmountable desire to give a stranger's arse a good smack? It's not always a gorgeous arse either; sometimes a bit of a fat bum, sometime truly gorgeous, sometimes just average, but the wish, nay, the need, wells up in me. I want to stop, push up my sleeve as I back up, take a bit of a run up, raise the arm high and just give that arse a good honest smack. I can hear the sound it will make, can feel the sensations: the slight bounce-off, the stinging palm, the feel of the cloth, the blood rushing to my face as the surprised smack-ee turns around, surprise turning very quickly to anger perhaps, though I'm tempted to say tinged with amusement or even sly enjoyment or arousal.
Anyway, there I was and there she was and as the above thoughts whizzed through my mind I could feel a grin spreading across my face, and that was when she straightened up and turned round, to see me (apparantly) inanely grinning to myself, but she was caught off-guard and started to smile too, in fact, her eyes sparkled and she turned quickly away, slightly embarassed, and I carried on walking in the opposite direction, the grin fast fading.
(, Tue 8 Jan 2008, 13:32, closed)
PreemptiveYou shouldn't have told him that.
Could have been a QOTW post in the making
(, Tue 8 Jan 2008, 21:48, )
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