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This is a question The B3TA Confessional

With the Pope about to visit the UK, what better time to unburden yourself of anything that's weighing on your mind by posting it on the internet? Pay particular attention to the Seven Deadly Sins of lust, greed, envy, pride, posting puns on the QOTW board and the other ones. Top story gets to kneel before His Holiness's noodly appendage, or something

(, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 12:47)
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Baby monitors..
Ah. Well, it was like this you see... I lived in a little terraced house, in an area popular with young families. When the baby Ott3r arrived, amidst a storm of primary coloured plastic and weird things that I still haven't worked out the use of, we bought a baby monitor. It turns out that there are only so many frequencies, and after rushing upstairs to calm the cries of mysteriously sleeping baby on a couple of occasions, we figured out that someone was using OUR frequency. Well, something had to be done. So, in the wee small hours of the morning... I picked up the "transmit" bit of the baby monitor, and started speaking into it....

And so it was that a house a few doors up the street suddenly lit up as the lights were switched on, and (I can only imagine) the concerned parents rushed to baby's room to find the source of a creepy babylike voice that was repeating the words "Satan is my Maaaaaster, Satan is my Maaaaaster.."

I'm not proud.
(, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 17:22, closed)
That
Is fucking genius.
(, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 18:00, closed)
Ker-lick!
Brilliant!
(, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 18:54, closed)
Fucking
brilliant! You didn't happen to see a priest go in next day did you?
(, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 19:19, closed)
single to Hull, please
and don't spare the horses!

*massive click*
(, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 19:28, closed)
you fucking should be
that is genius!
(, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 19:39, closed)
Wait...
If you weren't hearing your own baby, that means your receiver wasn't listening to the same frequency that your transmitter was broadcasting, meaning your transmitter wouldn't have been on the same frequency as their receiver. Meaning they couldn't have heard you...?

Unless your receiver was hearing BOTH babies.
(, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 21:58, closed)
...or you were a massive chin-on Jimmy fucking Hiller.

(, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 0:32, closed)
when did he say
that he wasn't hearing his own baby monitor? Another one can still interfere when your listening to your own
(, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 8:36, closed)
I'm off down the hardware store
Thanks for giving me a new hobby!
(, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 23:18, closed)
You should be.......
That's awesome!
I'm afraid of our baby monitors. In the 2 years I've been a mother I've been ridiculously conscious of them, heard too many horror stories.....
(, Thu 26 Aug 2010, 23:51, closed)
You c*nt...
haha....
(, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 8:57, closed)
Baby alarms don't work
We bought one, but she still got pregnant...

Seriously though, major clickage for a great story. I'd heard of people hearing their neighbours talking (and shagging, thought that's probably wishful thinking), but it hadn't occurred to me to SEND that way too!

I've also heard of someone who got caught out because he forgot that wifey could hear what he was saying to the baby: "Ah, does diddums need changing? Did mummy forget to do it? Yes, mummy's a fat lazy lump, isn't she? Yes she is. Daddy should have shagged Laura at work when he had the chance, shouldn't he? ..."
(, Fri 27 Aug 2010, 12:13, closed)
great reply
to a great post. click
(, Sat 28 Aug 2010, 17:46, closed)
Epic win if your neighbour's name was Rosemary

(, Sat 28 Aug 2010, 17:57, closed)
I'm gonna go and buy some in the hope that I can do this too to the next door neighbours
how many frequencies do you reckon there are?
(, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 9:15, closed)
Great story
Definitely gets my click :)
(, Tue 31 Aug 2010, 10:56, closed)

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