Good baby!
Had to pearoast this one.

THIS WAS A FRIEND OF A FRIEND!!! (i.e. me)

Imagine yourself at Lancaster University. Just for a minute.

Bloke meets girl on college bar crawl. Bloke and girl get snogging, bloke and girl decide to have sex in her room.

They go back to the room and the girl prepares a lovely nightcap, some sort of warmed mysterious liqueur that the guy hasn't experienced before, but it goes down very well apparently.

What happened immediately after that is rather inconsequential, I believe that they had mediocre to good sex, and fell asleep together.

However.

Chap wakes up early the next morning to a rather unsavoury smell, and a feeling of unwelcome and unexpected liquid warmth. He looks down and realises he is wearing a nappy. A full nappy.

Is terrified. Tries to leave without waking girl but she catches him and starts desperately trying to pull off the nappy, and this is the lovely part, she was screaming "Good baby, good baby!!".

She eventually rips the nappy off and sets about eating the contents. Man leaves. Man cries. Man has a shower.
(Waspard has your wank bank account details, Thu 22 Oct 2009, 15:50, 11 replies)

Thankfully
I got bored driving up the M6 and didn't get past the third line

(Christ! My eyes! Pass the mindbleach! etc. etc.)
( emvee cruor deo cruoris, Thu 22 Oct 2009, 16:04, closed)

Untrue post
is so untrue as to have completed a mobius loop of untruthfulness right back to core of the universe.


..oh, wait, Lancaster? Maybe.
( the mighty badger Aphrodite, on a bar stool, by your side, Thu 22 Oct 2009, 16:04, closed)

Hillarious
Definitely a traumatic episode. Poor bloke! (Why can't I stop laughing???!!!)
(ed-z, Thu 22 Oct 2009, 16:10, closed)

This confuses me.
Not the story itself, just why you felt the need to make it up.
( Zuowan, Thu 22 Oct 2009, 16:20, closed)

hmm
because that is his fantasy....
(skyfriend packaged in a protective atmosphere, for freshness, Thu 22 Oct 2009, 22:48, closed)

No
It's a true story. Horrible but true.
(Waspard has your wank bank account details, Fri 23 Oct 2009, 11:43, closed)

I've no option
but to believe it's made up, for the sake of my mental well-being.
( Rookie You'll have to speak up, I'm wearing a towel, Fri 23 Oct 2009, 13:39, closed)

...
But whose poo WAS it?
(TheWonderfulWombat It came to me in a dream., Sat 24 Oct 2009, 4:56, closed)

FAIL!!!
No, no, no!

If you wanted this believed, it should have read: "Man takes shower, man leaves, man gets drunk".

Men don't cry about things coming out of their arse, unless they were shoved in there without permission.
(all my scars face forward possesses 2.5% of a hyperalloy combat chassis, Sat 24 Oct 2009, 16:34, closed)

Bleurgh
Eat liquid shit? dear god, why?
(vladk2k, Wed 28 Oct 2009, 13:10, closed)

You didn't just say that!
Tell me you did not just say that!! *boke*
(RVD420 has his world coming down on, Thu 29 Oct 2009, 9:24, closed)