I am the world's biggest music geek
I'm slightly geeky in general. I did maths and science A levels. I spend far too long on the internet. I have asthma and frizzy hair. I don't get on with "normal" people. I spend my Thursday lunchtimes sniggering over QOTW. I am actually keeping a blog about my recent wisdom tooth extraction (seriously, take a look, you'll love it - it has grisly photos AND poo stories). None of these things alone are anything more than the normal activities of one blessed with more brains than social skills, but I bet I can beat you all for specialist geekiness standing on my head. Bow down to the world's greatest music geek.

When I was a child, I used to bunk off primary school to stay home and listen to music. I was obsessed with Stravinsky in particular. I had always thought that people's hair only stood on end in Scooby Doo until the first time I heard The Rite of Spring.

My parents started me off with piano and composition lessons when I was six. They weren't pushy parents or anything, but I begged them constantly. I was however convinced that I was crap at it because I couldn't play Bach or Ravel yet.

I have perfect pitch. In fact, if something is in the wrong key, I find this deeply annoying.

I took up the cello when I was 14, and did Grade 8 in a year.

I went to the Guildhall, even though I was quite bright and could have gone to university, but I didn't know this at the time - I thought that music was the only thing I would ever be any good at. Spent 4 years surrounded by people who would practise 8 hours a day and win loads of international competitions but were barely literate.

Grew to HATE the music profession and seriously want out.

Got a proper job when I graduated....at a classical music magazine!

I could explain the "Rite chord" and the "Tristan chord" to you if you wanted, and it's only relatively recently that I have realised that most people are really not interested.

I know the difference between French, German and Italian augmented 6th chords, and I know a fantastically politically incorrect method of remembering which is which.

Gratuitous key changes in pop songs make me go "Nnnnngnngnnnggggrrrrgggggghhghhhhh"

In possibly my geekiest moment yet, I recently modified the wikipedia pages for Lydian mode and the Octatonic scale. The Lydian mode page previously made no mention of the Simpsons theme tune, and the Octatonic scale page didn't mention Just.

But I think what really tops it all off, and what really qualifies me as the world's biggest music geek, is the fact that after all this, after spending hours in a practice room, having no life, missing out on my student years altogether, being able to analyse chord sequences, being able to tell you what key your car engine is in, I am still absolutely crazy about classical music. I still virtually take up residence at the Royal Albert Hall during Prom season, and still try to convert anybody who will listen to me for five minutes.

Nobody can beat me for music geekery.
(grandmasterfluffles Come to my Armageddon party on, Tue 11 Mar 2008, 11:21, 16 replies)

Do you compose?
Or just listen?
(frankspencer, Tue 11 Mar 2008, 11:29, closed)

I don't know...
I think I can still give you a good run for your geek money.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Tue 11 Mar 2008, 11:50, closed)

Pitch
I'm also cursed with perfect pitch, which makes my wife's addiction to X Factor et al doubly galling. I tend to hide somewhere and read until I get the all clear.

However my actual hearing is starting to go, especially on the left, due to not wearing ear defenders when I should have been. Although the point that that is the ear'ole that points towards my wife in the car and also the scratcher is not lost on me.

And I've got a crap singing voice. Hey Ho.
(osok Rebel without a clue, Tue 11 Mar 2008, 12:08, closed)

I never thought I'd say this...
...but you've got me intrigued.

"What's the difference between French, German and Italian augmented 6th chords?"

More to the point, what's this fantastically non-PC way of remembering it?
( uberdeity Wondered why Owen Lars knew of the term "hell" on, Tue 11 Mar 2008, 12:26, closed)

teeth
I just read your blog, i've had my wisdom teeth out as well but it was nothing compared to yours.
(phe, Tue 11 Mar 2008, 12:41, closed)

uberdeity
en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Augmented_sixth_chord

There's three types - Italian, French and German.

Italians are lazy. The Italian augmented 6th chord has only three notes, so it's a lazy chord.

The French are smelly. The French augmented 6th chord contains two augmented 4ths, so it's a dissonant, "smelly" sound.

Germans are devious. The German augmented 6th chord, when taken out of tonal context, sounds exactly like a diminished 7th chord, so it is a devious chord.

So you've got lazy, smelly and devious - Italian, French and German.
(grandmasterfluffles Come to my Armageddon party on, Tue 11 Mar 2008, 13:02, closed)

Hooray for music nerds!
At the age of ten I would spend long hours in the family bathroom, humming at the resonant frequency of the room and making things vibrate, then playing with the harmonics.
My parents thought I was radged.
(misspiggy In danger of having to get a job, Tue 11 Mar 2008, 13:13, closed)

that don't make you nerd...
...that makes you cool.

I think anyway....
(specialbrew, Tue 11 Mar 2008, 14:12, closed)

I'm a music geek too
But in a different way. I spend hours at my computer learning how to make it, but never actually do. I made a virtual synth not long ago.
(The Archduke of South London I'm in your Girlfriend eating her organs, Tue 11 Mar 2008, 14:33, closed)

star spangled banner
I can fart it. The whole thing.
(frankspencer, Tue 11 Mar 2008, 14:43, closed)

I used to have a car
which was on A at 70mph. But several cars later, my current diesel machine is so high geared that I'd have to be doing about 118mph (calculated by extrapolation - I don't actually drive that fast) to be in the same key.

Or 59mph of course, but the fundamental is drowned out by the road noise.

My mates used to take the piss out of me for knowing this. I found it perfectly normal behaviour.
( K2k6 has a proper job these days, Tue 11 Mar 2008, 15:25, closed)

Hmmm
I was so upset the other day when my chemistry teacher suggested that Glenn Gould was the finest interpreter of Beethoven (to be fair to her, my friend and I had just spent the last ten minutes air pianoing the first movement of the appasionata while she was rabbiting on about something to do with Arrhenius) that I absolutely launched into a long-winded but impassioned defense of Alfred Brendel, who is several orders of magnitude better than that facile charlatan. She looked quite upset. As much as I can rationalize that people don't like being told they're wrong, when it comes to Beethoven I just can't stop myself.

I also own a copy of George Russell's 'The Lydian Chromatic concept of Tonal Organization', can recognize and pianist that recorded on Blue Note, Impulse or Columbia in the 60s just from the chord voicings they favour, and contribute regularly to the radio three jazz message board. I also have a party trick (well, it would be if I ever went to any parties where this kind of thing would go down well) where I can do pretty convincing, though I say so myself, impressions of a large number of tenor saxophonists. My personal favourites are Don Byas, Booker Ervin, Lucky Thompson, and John Coltrane circa 1963.
(WarneMarsh My priority for frivolity begets quality jollity, Tue 11 Mar 2008, 20:34, closed)

Facile charlatan????
Booooooooo! Hisssssssssss!

He could only really play Bach though.
(grandmasterfluffles Come to my Armageddon party on, Tue 11 Mar 2008, 21:47, closed)

holy crap, that's atonal!
... people look at me queerly when i pronounce something to be thus, in conversaiton.

Combined with my English geekery, i fail at life.

But glad to know someone else is abusing their cultured skills!
(Schumann makes awesome quiches., Wed 12 Mar 2008, 1:07, closed)

Perfect pitch
Are you only perfect pitch in A440 or can you easily swap to, say, A415 or A444?
(ubergeekian, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 15:33, closed)

I take great delight
In huming along in harmony with whatever sounds happen to be around, whether they be from a vacuum cleaner, the tube train accelerating away, or police sirens. If I hear two or three notes in quick succession, then I can sing a piece of classical music that those notes can be heard at the start of.

I also like to sing whatever's on the radio in a stupidly operatic voice.
(The Empress it seems you CAN polish a turd!, Wed 12 Mar 2008, 15:41, closed)