She said no.
There was this girl in my school who I loved with all my heart, but she didn't know this... we'll call her K.

K was the prettiest girl i had ever laid eyes on, and from the moment i saw har, i knew she was the one for me.

We struck up a fairly good friendship, but this wasn't enough for me. I was moving to Scotland in a few weeks and i just couldn't contain myself. I told her how i felt and asked her if she would like to go out at some point. She said no.

She completely flattened me, i went into a state of depression for months. Thankfully i came out of the other side pretty much the same old person, but now i cannot place my faith in a girl.

So i have decided to remain single for the rest of my life, which may sound bad, but to me, it is a complete freedom.

Thank you K for setting my heart free.
(LiL_Arsewipe licked your face on, Sun 5 Oct 2008, 15:22, 18 replies)

This happened at school?
When you were a kid? And on the basis of that, you're now single forever?
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Sun 5 Oct 2008, 15:33, closed)

Yes
She completely destroyed my hopes (this was in secondary school not primary btw)
(LiL_Arsewipe licked your face on, Sun 5 Oct 2008, 15:35, closed)

Oh, secondary school.
Makes all the difference.
(Juan Quar is clinging to her front teeth on, Sun 5 Oct 2008, 16:06, closed)

It might be just me
But that makes me feel quite sad. Not the fact that you got turned down, it's what you're doing about it that's quite upsetting.

I got knocked back by every single girl I asked out right through school, right up until I left sixth form. To be honest, I can't blame them - I was (and still am) a bit of an ugly-mug, and it wasn't helped by the fact I was a bit of a cunt too.

What I'm getting at is that every time I got knocked back, it hurt for a while - it comes with the territory, and it's a risk that you take. But to at least know one way or the other is better than never making the move in the first place.

When I started university, I asked out somebody who, to be honest, was way out of my league. The full story is in a previous QOTW. For the first time in my life though, she took me up on the offer, and we shared together what are surely the best eight years of my life so far.

My point is that if I'd let these knock-backs get to me, I never would have had the fantastic last few years with my ex, and I'd be a worse person for it.
( rubberduck should only be used after consulting with your GP, Sun 5 Oct 2008, 16:07, closed)

Why did you ask her out if you were moving to Scotland?
Long distance relationships are troublesome for adults let alone teenagers.
( girlinthehole, Sun 5 Oct 2008, 16:14, closed)

yes i did,
but she didn't know i was moving because i knew that if i told her, she would have said no because of the distance problem, if she had said yes, then i would have stayed in England just to be with her no matter how much crap i'd have to put up with at home (which was the main reason for moving to Scotland)
(LiL_Arsewipe licked your face on, Sun 5 Oct 2008, 16:29, closed)

single isnt necessarily the answer
but the lesson here is surely that placing your own happiness and identity in someone else is where things go wrong.

I have done this im most of my relationships at some point and it always crushes me. Since the breakup of my marriage it has been the hardest thing not to look for happiness/contentment in the companionship of another, but to be happy with who i am, and in turn have a relationship with someone on those terms.

Dont rule women out dude, but dont place all your hopes in one, everyone is fallable and expectation is the cause of all dissappointment.

(appologies for spelling and forwardness)
(Hosey^, Sun 5 Oct 2008, 17:00, closed)

Sorry....
..... But all I can say to this is Harden The Fuck Up. I mean, as above, I got knocked back by every girl I asked out at school and beyond up until I was 18, Since then I've been in a string of relationships, some good, some bad. But richer for the experience overall.

Don't use it as an excuse, get out there and meet someone!
(batmowes Internet Dating Superstud, Sun 5 Oct 2008, 17:44, closed)

Why put so much expectation and pressure into one (future) relationship?

Speak to the nice ladies, have a laugh and if it all gets sexual then all the better just have a good time! Don't burden yourself with "THIS IS THE ONE" because you don't have to regiment your life like that...

Mind you if you're dead set on being single then fair do's...
( whenanimalsattackhumans clad in global hypercolour, Sun 5 Oct 2008, 18:00, closed)

I concur with the others
I met a girl last year at Uni called S, I really like her, still do despite royally fucking up not only my chance of getting involved with her (turns out, didn't have one anyway), but perhaps our friendship as well. Mainly because of a couple of things I said and the fact I bottled it when I should have been telling her how I strongly felt.

However, although the rejection is hurting rather badly right now thanks to it being less than 24 hours ago, I can already see the fact that I've learnt a good lesson and to stop pissing around with not only other people's but my own feelings as well.

I pity you for allowing one failed attempt at a relationship to completly dictate the way you live your life. I certainly am not and while won't be looking for a relationship for a while, I'm looking forward to having one.
(buzzmong procrastinating since 1987, Sun 5 Oct 2008, 19:23, closed)

.
I'll be honest. you should get over yourself and stop being so melodramatic.
(triley, Sun 5 Oct 2008, 20:49, closed)

Repeat after me
I get knocked down, but I get up again,
You're never going to keep me down.

Life is inevitably going to throw shit at you from time to time. Learning to weather the bad times is just as much part of life as enjoying the good times.

While it's your decision to make and I respect your decision, you should try coming out of your comfort zone from time to time. You'll never know what you'll come across.
( mistaspakkaman and the inedible shifting caterpillars, Sun 5 Oct 2008, 22:11, closed)

I have to agree
I've had the old 'we're better off as friends', been cheated on and lied too countless times.

It's never gonna put me off women. They're mega. They smell like summer and they have nice bits.
(Miraclefish How appropriate, you fight like a cow, Sun 5 Oct 2008, 22:31, closed)

Do you wear very tight jeans, have straightened hair that covers one eye, and occasionally cut yourself?
Because you sound like a whining 'emo' cunt.

Man up and get the fuck over it. I've had bad enough experiences with women; some people on b3ta have had far worse. We're all still going.

I mean, for fuck's sake. You're complaining about having a non reciprocated crush on someone and getting turned down. There are people here who are two divorces down and have only just found someone they can be happy with.

And stop eating so much cake.
( gone, Mon 6 Oct 2008, 2:30, closed)

It's cliche time...
There's a jar for every lid.

There's someone out there for everyone.

It'll happen when you least expect it.

No, I don't believe any of it either. Normal blokes don't find me attractive, and I refuse to change who I am just so I'll get a boyfriend.

How old are you anyway?
(ToysForBigBoys would spread her legs for Nick Clegg., Mon 6 Oct 2008, 6:23, closed)

you just wait
I resigned myself to singledom due to spudness, ugliness and generally being mental.

I havnt been single for more than a month since! and now have the lovliest bestest most beuatiful girl i could imagine. Honestly, she doesnt read B3TA so i'm not winning points, but she's the one i want for ever :D
(DreddPirateBob has watched every scifi film ever on, Mon 6 Oct 2008, 7:08, closed)

^^ this
exactly.
(aeon chicken Like the Millenium Falcon, only slower and noisier, Mon 6 Oct 2008, 9:17, closed)

there
have been some searingly heartbreaking and heartwarming stories this week.

This however is a big pile of emo-shite.

sorry
(Halfy By light alone, Mon 6 Oct 2008, 15:18, closed)