OK... am still somewhat confused, old boy
This is a bit like me announcing that I'm off to a Robbie Williams concert. Or a non-gay swingers' party.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:17, 2 replies, latest was 12 years ago)

Corporate ligging.
I have managed to persuade the old recidivist to suckle from the corporate teat.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:19, Reply)

Right, so, you've scored corporate hospitality at a club you don't support
and have decided that the best way to make a good impression is to take Monty along and put beer in him.
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:21, Reply)

This^

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:23, Reply)

Light the touch paper and retire.
Got my firm's tickets. Got 'em Boxing Day and New Year's Day too.
(Set your faces to Stunned Bigly, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:24, Reply)

Maybe it will be like Meat Loaf in the director's box at Anfield
in the 51st State.
( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:25, Reply)

I like this
Not least because you have just called Monty a fat bastard who's prone to spontaneous combustion
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:28, Reply)

Only inadvertently

( Boss Keloid Got your mother's maiden name tattooed on my arm, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:29, Reply)

+" "

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:32, Reply)

I intend to make the poor man rue this decision for the rest of his miserable life.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:26, Reply)

Not for long then

( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:27, Reply)

26 hours and counting.
I am heavily armed and have a nasty temper.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:34, Reply)

The lure of gratis lager is to strong to resist.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:22, Reply)

That is certainly understandable
I wouldn't personally go to a Williams gig even if there was free (and obligatory) cocaine at the door, but I suppose a football match is easier to ignore
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:25, Reply)

Fuck it I'd go to see Bronski Beat in Birmingham if someone offered me a free half of Fosters.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:27, Reply)

I don't believe you
Bronski Beat? Perhaps. Birmingham? Passable, as long as you were blindfolded between the car and the gig. Fosters? Get to fuck
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:29, Reply)

You sir, are right on the button today
Fosters? *shakes head*
( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:30, Reply)

I was trying to imagine the worst thing ever.

( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:33, Reply)

Fosters tastes of nothing at all

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:34, Reply)

You say it best

(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:36, Reply)

Allow me to adapt your original post
Bronski Beat Oasis, supported by Suede
Birmingham Derby, obviously
Fosters Fosters
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:35, Reply)

One of my pals was a guitar tech for Suede
The poor cunt had to see them literally hundreds of times. I met Brett Anderson at a party once. Worst prick ever. He was wearing a fucking kimono.
( Monty Boyce, My cheese game is strong, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:44, Reply)

THIS is when you take your sword

( sporters I’m sincerely gratitude to you, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:45, Reply)

I really fucking hate that twat
Whenever I need a favour from my best mate I remind him that my affection for him didn't waver when he revealed that Dog Man Star is his favourite album
(Darth Foxtrot A one-man army dedicated to making fetch happen, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:51, Reply)

I've seen some incredible gigs in Birmingham
But I've never drunk Fosters at any of them.
( tangledupinblue hairy badge with moving eyes, Tue 22 Nov 2011, 9:31, Reply)