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(, Sun 1 Apr 2001, 1:00)
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Morning you fat fucks
www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healthnews/9297496/Calling-someone-fatty-could-become-a-hate-crime.html

oh dear...

Alt: pizza bash, who was pissed, did barry cry and leave to buy some clothes, has Monty's hideous facial growth cleared up?

altalt: motivate me to work.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 8:57, 150 replies, latest was 12 years ago)
At the top

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:01, Reply)
what goes on tour stays on tour, NA
We did miss you though. Photos on FB later. Personal favourite: monty and his mates the police...
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:02, Reply)
I am quite missable
please tell me he was being cavity searched
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:04, Reply)
What did he do this time?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:04, Reply)
A police horse

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:06, Reply)

1.bp.blogspot.com/-XXbukVwiPKU/T3nibHsFZlI/AAAAAAAAhFo/snYM9fBmnD8/s1600/Horse%2Bgets%2Bfrisky%2Bwith%2Bpoliceman.jpg
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:08, Reply)
Turn up?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:07, Reply)
Then tried snorting the flour they use on the dough?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:13, Reply)
Sting was there?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:05, Reply)
Absolutely fucking ridiculous.
Then again, at the same time I'm of the opinion that bullies in school need to have heavier punishments levelled at them, but I suppose you can't really have it both ways.

Alt: I had pizza last night too. It was shit.

Alt Alt: No.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:06, Reply)
I for one did not miss you last night.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:07, Reply)
I didn't ask you if you did, but thanks for making me feel shit first thing in the morning

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:08, Reply)
I'd report him for bullying.
It's illegal.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:10, Reply)
damn straight

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:10, Reply)
From FAQ.
There is somebody really annoying on the board, is it OK to be rude to them?

Absolutely not. If you are really annoyed by another boarder, you can click the 'Ignore' button under their posts and everything they post will be hidden from you (you can always un-ignore them later if you like). Please don't be horrible to other people just because they are new, or you didn't like their picture, or posted something that bothers you. If you can't say anything nice, then don't say anything.

If there is somebody on the board who doesn't know what to do, you can always point them in the direction of this FAQ in a friendly way (or use the secret code).

There are moderators about to deal with people who abuse the messageboard, replying to somebody calling them a cunt isn't very constructive and will just encourage people to keep trolling.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:11, Reply)
Is there any specific guidance on how to deal with bent spastics?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:12, Reply)
Bully them?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:14, Reply)
send them money and cake in the post?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:14, Reply)
Ask here
www.b3ta.com/gaz/write/21103
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:14, Reply)
tl;dr.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:15, Reply)
Dunno where you've been, but our mod went running away in a flood of tears
we're adrift and modless
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:17, Reply)
SHUT THE FUCK UP YOU PUSSY

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:18, Reply)
that's not barry

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:18, Reply)
this place is bloody full of big girly blouse wearing pissants lately
its really grinding my squib
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:20, Reply)
BIG GIRLS BLOUSE IS DEAD YOU INSENSITIVE BASTARD!!!

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:20, Reply)
GOOD, FUCK HER
unless you're one of the many board members who already have
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:22, Reply)
Obvious solution is to DYAAKY

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:23, Reply)
i ahrdly think we need more death around here, i doubt you could cope with the loss

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:24, Reply)
I cope quite well with it now, about as well as can be expected.
But thank you for your concern anyway.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:27, Reply)
here for you xxx

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:30, Reply)
Barry is different IRL than I had expected.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:20, Reply)
Barry is a fucking geezer

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:23, Reply)
less of a drunk weeping pussy?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:23, Reply)
Yes.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:23, Reply)
but fat, yes?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:24, Reply)
Nope. Short though.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:25, Reply)
this is very rude coming from you

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:28, Reply)
It's nice that you were his buddy last night, then.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:29, Reply)
Brothers in (short) arms.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:30, Reply)
Flid.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:35, Reply)
On the other hand...
www.telegraph.co.uk/comment/columnists/charlesmoore/8084898/Calling-Naked_Ape-a-bent-spastic-is-perfectly-acceptable.html
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:08, Reply)
Why is that story illustrated witha picture of a tranny?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:10, Reply)
Is that not your mum?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:11, Reply)
MY MUM'S DEAD YOU BASTARD

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:15, Reply)
lol, not really

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:15, Reply)
Check again.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:19, Reply)
she will be, eventually

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:20, Reply)
:'(
who'll tuck me in at night?
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:22, Reply)
some sort of strikethrough about fucking you in the arse

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:23, Reply)
Bumder.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:27, Reply)
well, she did ask

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:29, Reply)
A crime, to tellsomeone who's fat, they're fat.
Sounds about par.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:08, Reply)
POLITICAL CORRECTNESS GORN MAAAAAAD!!!!
Next they'll be saying we can't call darkies Gollywog.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:12, Reply)
Or Jigaboo

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:15, Reply)
Or Sambo.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:15, Reply)
or jungle bunny

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:16, Reply)
Or Cotton Picker

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:16, Reply)
or coon.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:16, Reply)
what do you call a black man with a stutter?


A cocoon
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:17, Reply)
Oh man I shouldn't have laughed at that.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:20, Reply)
You Aussies are so racist.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:21, Reply)
I know, it's a bit shameful really.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:23, Reply)
PoliceAcademylols
Not an oft used phrase
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:16, Reply)
i love it when fatties get defensive about being fat
shut the fuck up and lose some weight you bloody drain on society
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:16, Reply)
I'm going to jump on the lose weight guide bandwagon, with my 7 word book, entitled "BP Guide To Weight Loss".
Eat less shit, do some fucking exercise.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:18, Reply)
God you're a right publishing house
'BP's how not to get a new job' being your current best seller
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:20, Reply)
but he's got them ON THE ROPES

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:21, Reply)
THEY'RE FINISHED IF HE WALKS

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:22, Reply)
lol

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:21, Reply)
but
1: shit food tastes good
2: shit food is cheaper
3: I don't eat that much
4: it's glandular/genetic
5: i do exercise, honest
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:21, Reply)
then eat yourself to death away from the rest of us, you're getting in the way

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:22, Reply)
If you're not living on the edge, you're taking up too much space

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:24, Reply)
HE'S STEALING OUR OXYGEN, KILL HIM TO DEATH.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:24, Reply)
you go first baz, i'm right behind you

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:25, Reply)
Hey.
1 - no it doesn't. it's greasy and oily.
2 - no it isn't - in the long run you spend more on your health as a result.
3 - bullshit
4 - bullshit
5 - bullshit.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:24, Reply)
I should point out that I was simply outlineing what fat people say, I'm not fat at all.
www.telegraph.co.uk/news/newstopics/howaboutthat/5004431/Family-who-are-too-fat-to-work-say-22000-worth-of-benefits-is-not-enough.html
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:26, Reply)
Oh, that's okay then.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:26, Reply)
That's bonkers
How can it be a hate crime to tell a fat person they're fat? Will it now be considered bullying to tell a thin person they're thin?
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:24, Reply)
lets be honest, that's not going to be much of a problem around here

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:25, Reply)
Speak for yourself chubs

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:26, Reply)
i'm just big boned and cuddly :(((((

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:26, Reply)
"Well wrapped"

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:35, Reply)
I see it as the same sorta thing as telling a smoker how bad it is for their health.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:25, Reply)
They should go back to where they've come from

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:25, Reply)
Or a short person that they are short.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:27, Reply)
or a black person that they're... oh

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:27, Reply)
totally drinking a beer sat on my doorstep right now.
Barry's asleep on the kitchen floor.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:25, Reply)
Ha ha ha. Day off then?
Edit: have you stolen his ipad yet?
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:26, Reply)
I'd never do such a thing.
sent from my ipad
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:46, Reply)
Was he any good?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:26, Reply)
I imagine it was like fucking a whale's blowhole

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:27, Reply)
Barry usually sobs into the pillow most nights anyway

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:27, Reply)
"Why, WHY did she leave meeeeeeee"
*reaches for booze, drugs and ipad*
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:29, Reply)
IVEFUCKINLOSTMYCHANELSUNGLASSES
boohoohoohooboohoohoohooboohoohoohooboohoohoohoo
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:31, Reply)
at 11.30 AM no less

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:31, Reply)
Day off then?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:26, Reply)
day off raping barry then?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:26, Reply)
hahaha!

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:26, Reply)
day off hahaha! raping barry on the kitchen floor rape day off barry?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:27, Reply)
I left yours around 5am
there's very little to do at work today so I have opted to ring in sick.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:28, Reply)
Sounds like my decision to head off early was a wise one.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:29, Reply)
decision barry rape 5am hahaha day off rape barry off decision

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:31, Reply)
Not necessarily
I'm just a spanner for staying up ridiculously late and getting hammered midweek. I don't actually feel all that bad, I just really, really didn't want to go to work. Especially given that there's next to bugger all for me to do there today.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:35, Reply)
spanner hammer barry rape day off 5am! hahaha

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:36, Reply)
barry barry rape day off barry day off rape barry barry rape fuck day off rape barry fuck

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:28, Reply)
left yours at 5am barry rape fuck day off barry rape 5am day off barry rape fuck hahaha?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:29, Reply)
day Barry off kitchen rape Hahaha

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:29, Reply)
5am barry rape day off rape barry hahaha rape? 5am!

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:31, Reply)
Hahahah RAPE

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:32, Reply)
Best of all the vegetable oils

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:35, Reply)
vegetable oil 5am barry rape day off

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:35, Reply)
This is funny
(!)
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:37, Reply)
funny vegetabole rape barry day off 5am barry hahaha

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:38, Reply)
Couldn't you have poured him onto a couch?
You fucking bad host you.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:36, Reply)
He was too busy raping him
at 5am.
In the Kitchen.
Hahahaha.
On his day off.
Or something.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:36, Reply)
DAY OFF

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:37, Reply)
i don't have a 'couch' you vulgar man.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:37, Reply)
So what do you call a chair then?
And yet another reason not to live in London.

www.bbc.co.uk/news/magazine-18234930
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:39, Reply)
Where is Kroney anyway?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:40, Reply)
i raped him at 5am Hahaha etc

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:41, Reply)
Merde rape?

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:42, Reply)
first degree merder

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:43, Reply)


(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:46, Reply)
Some interesting stuff in that report!
About how French bureaucracy and red tape is worse than England, how it's easier to sack someone in the UK than in France etc etc.
On the other hand, we've got the CBI and the Tory toffs saying we need less bureaucracy and the only way to protect jobs is to make it easier to sack people!
Cunts.
BTW, from the figures they've given, there's more French people living in London than the whole population of my home town
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:48, Reply)
Lets have some stories then

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:40, Reply)
there aren't any really

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:42, Reply)
Specifically stories about kitchen rape at 5am on a day off hahaha?
Or do you think we've covered that adequately?
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:43, Reply)
No, this hasn't been milked to leathery emptyness

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:44, Reply)
funny day off spanner hammer rape hahaha barry
5AM
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:44, Reply)

www.funwithspot.com/uk/
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:43, Reply)
Thanks Rory!

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:44, Reply)

www.funwithspot.com/uk/story_creator.html
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:44, Reply)
Where's Bobby when I need his creative input

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:44, Reply)
ENJOYING FOUR MONTHS DOING NOTHING, SUCKER!!!!!

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:45, Reply)
His left hand will be all leathery by September
how will he cope
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:48, Reply)
omfg i know what i'm doing this afternoon

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:45, Reply)
spot gets raped on the kitchen floor at 5am hahahaha

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:46, Reply)
actual officelol
*kills self*
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:46, Reply)
barry 5am couch hammer spanner rape day off hahaha!!!

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:47, Reply)
WINNA!!!!!!

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:50, Reply)
Well it's not Sasha

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:46, Reply)
>:(
she left a long time ago man, i'm over it
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:47, Reply)
It was good, I had fun. Rocked up fashionably late
and got stuck on the girl's end of the table whilst they talked about knitting and kittens and hymen-popping operations whilst HimJim told fat labia stories.

Nice to see Barry, seems sound. I went home at a reasonable hour because I'm a responsible adult and not a debauched sickie-throwing stopout like SOME people.

I wasn't feeling very sexy last night though, so I had to get raped at 5am lolol

responsible BENT
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:52, Reply)
hahaha barry day off lol

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:53, Reply)
So really, it's a bit cunty to loath the parents of the woman you love..,
.,, and them resent when they stay over for one week when they're people who paid your mortgage. I donno if I could take it if a partner of mine had that attitude.
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:57, Reply)
NICE TO SEE YOU LAST NIGHT GONZ
YOU WERE LOOKING WELL
(, Wed 30 May 2012, 9:57, Reply)
=((((

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 10:03, Reply)
One day, I'm going to host a Bash here, and you guys aren't going to be able to come, and I'll be talking about how awesome it was the next day and you'll ALL be jealous.

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 10:03, Reply)
solo bash, whoooop!

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 10:07, Reply)
5am! hahaha rape couch day off spanner hammer

(, Wed 30 May 2012, 10:08, Reply)

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