His sister was a mean old bitty.
At the tender age of 11 (me, not my grandad), after I had dumped a pitcher of milk on my little sister's head, I was told by Grandad, "Don't make enemies of your sisters. One day, they might be all you have left. And if they wanted to, they could make your life miserable."
Nearly thirty years later, I realised how right he was. One of my sisters has done her best to alienate every member of our family (she has adoption issues), but my little sister, with the milky hair, is now one of my best friends and we have such fun when I get to see her (she's in Canadia).
Thanks, Grandad, but how do I get my other sister to smarten up and stop trying to ruin everyone else's life?
(w4I4q1O1 was hard at work on, Thu 19 Jun 2008, 17:58, 5 replies)

You can't
choosing your friends is compensation for not getting to choose your family.
(TheWeeWitch hasn't been here much recently .., Thu 19 Jun 2008, 18:21, closed)

Dump some milk
on her head too, she is obviously bitter at being left out all those years ago.
(Rsoles, Thu 19 Jun 2008, 19:49, closed)

@Rsoles
I like it. I will do this when I see her.
Mwuhahahah!
(w4I4q1O1 was hard at work on, Thu 19 Jun 2008, 22:48, closed)

Adoption issues
Are a strange thing, and obviously can be emotive, but have you considered that it may be a convenient peg to hang something else on? I only mention this as it is the only way I can explain the behaviour of my own sister. We were both adopted, raised through very happy childhoods by (the same) loving mum & dad, I am happy and have never felt strongly bothered about pursuing my biological 'family'. Mum is dead now, dad is still alive, and they have always been good enough for me. To hear my sister speak, you would not believe we were talking about the same family, same childhood, same mum & dad. She has 'found' her 'real' family, which she did before mum died, causing huge heartache in the process. It has fucked up her life in many ways, but I really don't think that adoption was the issue. I was the second child, with a 2.5 yr gap, and even now at almost 45, I still believe that she has never recovered from good old-fashioned sibling jealousy, having been removed from centre-stage for a while, following my arrival. Having always been 2nd in the pecking order throughout childhood, I was astonished the first time I heard her claim (scream, actually) that I was always the favourite, and got everything I wanted. This must mean that I wanted the smallest room, less pocket money, and occasionally having to wear supiciously feminine-looking Tshirts, and jeans that buttoned the wrong way and didn't have much room 'in front' :@ D (we were'nt flush with cash for quite a while)
This may, of course, bear no resemblance to your own situation, which would be just as well, as I have no answer for you. My sis is still bitter, angry, self-obsessed, and there appears to have been fuck all I could do about it, over the years. I've now given up, and filed it under "just dunno, really", as I find I'm much happier if I ignore her and just try to remember the neicephews' birthdays occasionally :@ ]
Good luck.
( blyerkit e k trilby, Fri 20 Jun 2008, 10:03, closed)

@blyerkit
You are my spiritual brother!
My oldest sister believes that she was *hated* as a child by our parents. My mum was abused (in every way) by her father, and my sister uses this as excuse for her now miserable life - obviously sis had terrible parents! They always bent over backwards for her - they still do. We as brothers and sisters never treated her differently at all.
She conveniently ignores the fact that each of my other siblings are happy, successful, and fully adjusted adults.
I guess you're right, she doesn't really have 'adoption issues', she has many other issues that she blames on being adopted and (feeling like she has) never being loved.
(w4I4q1O1 was hard at work on, Fri 20 Jun 2008, 13:19, closed)