Biggest Sexual RegretOur glorious leader Rob asks: Most of us have done it, right? You've seen a grown lady/man naked, right? What's your biggest regret connected to The Acts of Venus? "Your Mum" does not an answer make, but big fat lies about threesomes are welcome.
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Scaryduck LIKES EGG, Thu 8 Dec 2011, 13:34)
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I'm too nice, evidentlyI have a long list of sexual regrets, mostly involving fat or ugly lasses, or mate's girlfriends, but one regret is by far my biggest.
It's the usual tale of a missed opportunity.
Many years ago, in a city far, far away, I did a boring job for a boring company. The office consisted predominately of blokes in their early 20's, women of a certain age and one girl who would definitely qualify as a hottie. Her name was Louise and she was as fit as a butcher's dog. She was the total package: pretty face and a slim body with amazing double-D tits.
She was on a neighbouriung team and I'd never really spoken to her that much. until, that is, we got stuck on a project together that required us to spend a week in each other's company. During this time, we chatted a lot to pass the time and it quickly emerged that we had absolutely nothing in common. Like seriously nothing - we liked different music, films, TV, books, football teams, food, cars, holiday destinations, bars, clubs... everything, basically. The only thing we had in common was that we are of the same species.
Despite the glaring differences, we got on like a house on fire and became really good friends. We'd chat via email all day, have lunch together every day and text each other all evening. We then started going out with each other, purely as friends. Since she lived with her parents and I had my own flat, she would often come round for the evening and would quite often spend the night, but they was no sex involved, only the occasional snog and a grope.
Our relatioship was best summed up when she drunkenly told me "you're like my gay best friend who isn't gay".
So one day, she texts me to say she's had an awful day and is coming round. She'd been at her grandad's funeral and some petty family squabble had bubbled over into a fight. When she arrived, she was pissed and clutching a full botlle of vodka. We (well, mostly her, to be honest) proceded to finish off this bottle of vodka before she announced that she didn't want to go home and would be staying with me that night.
We climbed into bed and snuggled up, like we always did. I was nearly asleep when she poked me and said "Scouse, I want sex"
I was suddenly very awake and said "what, with me?"
She slurred "yep, with you, right now"
And I said "no, you're pissed and emotional"
She said "I don't care, I want you"
I said "You don't really, you're too drunk to know what you want"
She said "Oh, okay" and went to sleep.
Not only am I still kicking myself about this now, ten years later, she still loves to remind me that I'm too nice to get in her pants.
(, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 14:23, 11 replies)
You twit.If she's still talking about it, she still wants you to shag her.
For crying out LOUD!!!!
*shakes head slowly*
(, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 14:33, closed)
Two problems with that1) I'm semi-happily married
2) her boyfriend is a bit fo a psycho and would definitely carve me up, were I to lay a hand on her.
But yeah, she still wants it...
(, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 14:37, closed)
If you think you need to specify you are 'semi- happily' married.You are unhappily married.
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 14:38,
closed)
So basically......the funeral scene in Wedding Crashers is true?
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Regger, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 14:48,
closed)
Not seen itWhat happens?
(, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 14:53, closed)
www.b3ta.com/questions/sexyregrets/post1464945
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scarpe We Stole Bikes, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 14:58,
closed)
What's the problem?Would you honestly feel better if you'd taken advantage of a pissed and emotional friend?
(, Fri 9 Dec 2011, 17:41, closed)
friendyou have a friendship that has lasted 10 years. An orgasm does not last very long. Be thankful how things turned out.
(, Tue 13 Dec 2011, 16:10, closed)
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