I had the worst flatmates ever at UNIThey used to wake me every day with the telly blaring out the theme tune to Neighbours.
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Thu 20 Nov 2003, 13:04,
archived)
Shitty flat-mateWhilst at Uni I had the missfortune to live with a bloke who got shit in the shower. It took a bit of detective work to figure it out, but basically the tight sod wasn't buying bog paper, but unfurling the inner cardboard tube. Its curvey springlike nature then made it the perfect arse-catapult, sending poo into the shower opposite. Oh, and he had his alarm clock set to play a bit from Pulp Fiction...the bit where they rob the cafe...so I would be awoken by that bird screaming something about mother f**kers. Oh, and he tried to get off with my girlfriend! Still, what he doesn't know is that we got his mattress out of a skip and never told him!
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Thu 20 Nov 2003, 13:19,
archived)
footprints from the bathsame UNI flatshare and one of the dippy females left the door open on a regular basis.
One morning I awoke to the door slamming as someone went out. When I looked outside my door (opposite the bathroom) there was a trail of white footprints leading out of the bathroom and out through the now closed door. I traced the footsteps outside the block of flats.
Someone - unknown to this day - had found our open flat door, used our bath, talcum powdered themselves and then walked barefoot back out of our flat and then the building.
Also in the same flat, we used to pour stale cereal out of the window. One guy in the flat below tried to catch it with his mouth. He loved the stuff.
We had an egg fight with the flat downstairs once and one egg flew through my window right into the back of my wardrobe, where I didn't find it until I moved out. Stange thing was, it didn't smell.
Then there was the time I got fined by the Uni for playing Colorblind James Experience albums at full volume, late in the evening that they had done a gig at our Uninon.
"I'm considering a move to Memphis... When I get there I'll put a sign on my door saying 'Feel free to disturb me, that's what I came here for" -- lyrics from CJB's most famous song.
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Thu 20 Nov 2003, 14:23,
archived)
One morning I awoke to the door slamming as someone went out. When I looked outside my door (opposite the bathroom) there was a trail of white footprints leading out of the bathroom and out through the now closed door. I traced the footsteps outside the block of flats.
Someone - unknown to this day - had found our open flat door, used our bath, talcum powdered themselves and then walked barefoot back out of our flat and then the building.
Also in the same flat, we used to pour stale cereal out of the window. One guy in the flat below tried to catch it with his mouth. He loved the stuff.
We had an egg fight with the flat downstairs once and one egg flew through my window right into the back of my wardrobe, where I didn't find it until I moved out. Stange thing was, it didn't smell.
Then there was the time I got fined by the Uni for playing Colorblind James Experience albums at full volume, late in the evening that they had done a gig at our Uninon.
"I'm considering a move to Memphis... When I get there I'll put a sign on my door saying 'Feel free to disturb me, that's what I came here for" -- lyrics from CJB's most famous song.