Pretty crap, but......in my teen days, I got smashed on Diamond White in the park, then stumbled home and vomited all over my bedroom. When questioned by my poor mother the next morning (I'd kept quiet the night before and gently passed out), I told her that the root beer in McDonalds hadn't agreed with me.
And she believed me...
I've never felt so guilty in my life, and she only found out the truth recently.
(And she believed me...
I've never felt so guilty in my life, and she only found out the truth recently.
jonnybear Jonnybear,
Thu 27 Nov 2003, 10:18,
archived)
UnitMy sister and I used to fight and get each other into trouble when were quite young, but the best one was round about the time she had started to learn how to write. It was still quite a novelty to her and she liked to practice it. Around this time my parents had also bought her a new cupboard/set of drawers/wardrobe unit type thing, quite expensive. I then, in my crappiest handwriting, scribbled "Aimee" on the inside of the new unit with the sharp bit of a compass and waited for my mum to find it. My mum called her up the stairs and asked her why she had written her name on the new unit and damaged it and she quite rightly denied it, and suggested that it was probably me. My mum beat her till she yelped for lying. Very funny.
(,
Thu 27 Nov 2003, 10:22,
archived)
my mum was too clever for thatI got a sound whupping for (very cunningly I thought) writing my sister's name in toothpaste all over the bathroom tiles. Much as I insisted that my sister had done it, mum was not fooled.
(,
Thu 27 Nov 2003, 10:27,
archived)
BedAround the same time, I got a new cabin bed, one of those ones that has a desk and a wardrobe and a bunk bed on top. This was the first bunk bed we ever had in the house, so I was very pleased with it and my sister decided she would quite like one too. The actual mattress was kept in place by 3 large wooden slats that sat underneath it and were quite sturdy but moveable. I moved the one nearest the ladder that led up to the bunk bed on top of the middle slat, leaving a large hole and pushed the matress into the edge of the surrounding bed border to keep it in place. Then I asked my sister if she wanted to race me up to the bed to see who could get onto the matress first. She ran up the stairs like a shot, up the ladder and fell through the matress head first. She broke the desk underneath it with her head. I couldnt really get away with that one, I considered lying but I had a fair notion that lying would just make a bad situation with the folks worse. I think I received a sound thrashing for my efforts.
(,
Thu 27 Nov 2003, 10:32,
archived)
not quite a lie.... Not quite a lie.....
i was constantly annoying people in my house - one of my fav's was when i was about 4 and my sister had taught me to 'give her 5'. I thought it would be very funny i put pins in between each of my fingers and shout at her give me 5. She did and i remember her face changing and her starting to scream as so noticed all then pins in my hand and the blood pricks on her fingers - quite funny.
There was also the time when i challanged my brother to a race when i was about 5 - he gave me a head start. I ran on a bit and hid around the corner and as he came running by at fullk speed i tripped him up sending him down like a sack of shit and splitting his chin at the same time - he still has the scare now 15 years on - quality
(,
Thu 27 Nov 2003, 11:00,
archived)
i was constantly annoying people in my house - one of my fav's was when i was about 4 and my sister had taught me to 'give her 5'. I thought it would be very funny i put pins in between each of my fingers and shout at her give me 5. She did and i remember her face changing and her starting to scream as so noticed all then pins in my hand and the blood pricks on her fingers - quite funny.
There was also the time when i challanged my brother to a race when i was about 5 - he gave me a head start. I ran on a bit and hid around the corner and as he came running by at fullk speed i tripped him up sending him down like a sack of shit and splitting his chin at the same time - he still has the scare now 15 years on - quality
This is similar to one of the first posts, but....I was working at Wellworths in the 'computer' department on a dodgy NVQ scheme, which meant wandering around the shop floor scanning all the items with a little scanner and transfering all that data into the computer at the back office. Mind numbing. I had been in the job for a month and it was my birthday and the bastards were making me work a full day anyway. So I went to the bar with a couple of the other guys from the course and had a few drinks and it was a nice day and so on, and I didnt want to go back to work. I got one of the guys, a wierd round-shaped bloke called Dave, to phone in to Wellworths after I went back to work and pretend to be my 'uncle Dave' with some family business. I arrived back at work after lunch and was sitting in the computer room for about 10 minutes when the main office called me down for a grave chat.
Them: "We've just had a call from you're uncle Dave, its quite important."
Me: "Oh, Uncle Dave? What did he want?
Them: "It turns out your grandfather has taken ill and has been rushed to hospital. They aren't quite sure what the matter is, but they need you to go right now."
Me: (stunned, aghast expression)
Them: "I'm sorry to hear about your grandfather. Can I ask what age he would be now?"
Me: "Oh, um, around 76-77 I think, but I can't be exactly sure. I'm sorry, I'm just a little shaken."
Them: "We called your house as well."
Me: "Oh right."
Them: "Your dad says you don't have a grandfather."
ME: "Oh right..."
They let me have the day off. I didn't have to go back either. Quality.
(,
Thu 27 Nov 2003, 11:08,
archived)
Them: "We've just had a call from you're uncle Dave, its quite important."
Me: "Oh, Uncle Dave? What did he want?
Them: "It turns out your grandfather has taken ill and has been rushed to hospital. They aren't quite sure what the matter is, but they need you to go right now."
Me: (stunned, aghast expression)
Them: "I'm sorry to hear about your grandfather. Can I ask what age he would be now?"
Me: "Oh, um, around 76-77 I think, but I can't be exactly sure. I'm sorry, I'm just a little shaken."
Them: "We called your house as well."
Me: "Oh right."
Them: "Your dad says you don't have a grandfather."
ME: "Oh right..."
They let me have the day off. I didn't have to go back either. Quality.
Similar -When 17/18, my mate and I built a skateboard ramp and ran it as a sort of business. (Really, he did it all, and a few of us basked in the reflected glory, but hey).
Anyway, we used to have a rota for opening up this warehouse on a Saturday afternoon, and "supervising" the kids. For supervising read "encouraging to try ever more dangerous and stupid tricks".
One Saturday, it was my turn. The ramp was supposed to be open at 3pm, but round about 12pm, a few of my other friends offered my some shrooms of the magic variety, and we merrily brewed in the region of 300 each. Which is a lot.
About 2pm, somehow I remembered that I had to open these ramps, and it became my mission to remember to do it. However, the problem was that I didn't have the key, my mate Tommy (the one who *really* built it) had the key. But where to find Tommy?
In my Hallucinogenic Wisdom, after phoning his mum (which was fiucking wierd on shrooms) and him not being there, I decided to go to my folks house, to see if he had dropped the key off there.
Heavily tripping, I walked into the house and greeted my combined family, who were sitting down to a family meal at the time, with the following:
take a deep breathHave you seen Tommy?Has Tommy Phoned? I need to see Tommy, he's got the keys! Have *you* got the keys? I need to see Tommy... has Tommy phoned? Has Tommy phoned? No, I guess he probably hasn't. Right I'd best go try to find him. See you later. Bye!release breath, and leave the house rapidly
I left the house and me and my mates literally ran away. To the safety of the skateboard ramp warehouse, where we found Tommy sitting there supervising the ramp. When he realised I didn't have the key, he'd decided to open up himself, since that's where he probably would have spent Saturday anyway.
My parents thought I'd just been drinking, and I've never sought to disillusion them. It's a great druggy story down the pub, though!
(,
Thu 27 Nov 2003, 13:01,
archived)
Anyway, we used to have a rota for opening up this warehouse on a Saturday afternoon, and "supervising" the kids. For supervising read "encouraging to try ever more dangerous and stupid tricks".
One Saturday, it was my turn. The ramp was supposed to be open at 3pm, but round about 12pm, a few of my other friends offered my some shrooms of the magic variety, and we merrily brewed in the region of 300 each. Which is a lot.
About 2pm, somehow I remembered that I had to open these ramps, and it became my mission to remember to do it. However, the problem was that I didn't have the key, my mate Tommy (the one who *really* built it) had the key. But where to find Tommy?
In my Hallucinogenic Wisdom, after phoning his mum (which was fiucking wierd on shrooms) and him not being there, I decided to go to my folks house, to see if he had dropped the key off there.
Heavily tripping, I walked into the house and greeted my combined family, who were sitting down to a family meal at the time, with the following:
take a deep breathHave you seen Tommy?Has Tommy Phoned? I need to see Tommy, he's got the keys! Have *you* got the keys? I need to see Tommy... has Tommy phoned? Has Tommy phoned? No, I guess he probably hasn't. Right I'd best go try to find him. See you later. Bye!release breath, and leave the house rapidly
I left the house and me and my mates literally ran away. To the safety of the skateboard ramp warehouse, where we found Tommy sitting there supervising the ramp. When he realised I didn't have the key, he'd decided to open up himself, since that's where he probably would have spent Saturday anyway.
My parents thought I'd just been drinking, and I've never sought to disillusion them. It's a great druggy story down the pub, though!
Another similar story...Me and the missus double dropped some snowflakes (back in good ol' 96) and were happily tripping our tits off. We went to her house to watch telly etc. Shortly after we arrived her mum came home, walked through the front door and said hello. Then another version of her mum walked in and stood next to her mum, and again said hello. I got up screamed and ran full pelt into the french windows at the other end of the room. Got up off the floor then ran past the two versions of her mum through the front door and off down the road.
Turns out it was her mum and very similar looking aunt.
bumsocks.
(,
Mon 1 Dec 2003, 10:19,
archived)
Turns out it was her mum and very similar looking aunt.
bumsocks.