When I was young and foolishI was told that every cigarette took four minutes off your life. I wanted to then always have cigarettes with me on my deathbed so I could die just before I lit my cigarette, thereby causing some kind of temporal infarction. What a twat.
(
Bingowings 2011 Businessman of the Year (Watford Branch),
Tue 18 Feb 2003, 19:34,
archived)