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# when I was at school
the office secretary came in n said to my teacher Mr Garton 'your wife's just called she's in labour and on her way to Hospital' to which he replied, 'okay, tell her i'll see her tonight' look at us and said 'well there's nothing I can do is there?' and carried on

I always wanted to but never had the guts to use this line
(, Thu 17 Apr 2008, 12:55, archived)