If I ever ...
take leave of my senses and study to become a teacher. I will introduce, my first Powerpoint slide of any class.

"Should any phone ring in my presence, I will confiscate said phone, answer the call and humiliate the callee to the extent of my pleasure and the enjoyment of the rest of the tutorial class."

Said examples are:

- To the callee's mum, tearfully posing as the previous night's one night stand, and asking if he's like this with all other girlfriends.

- To an unidentified, probably female, caller, that I have contracted genital warts from callee, and I advised they test for same.

- To the callee's employer, posing as a distressed and earnest girlfrient, explaining the recent demise of the caller, and wish the employer well in filling the gap left by the demise of said callee.

Just as well really.
(Que?, Sat 19 Mar 2011, 7:27, 10 replies)

Awww man.
I can't wait to hear about all those other times you didn't have a hilarious anecdote but imagined what it might be like if you ever did have an amusing anecdote.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sat 19 Mar 2011, 8:57, closed)

Wow ...
personally trolled by Shambolic. I am honoured.
(Que?, Sat 19 Mar 2011, 22:57, closed)

Does anybody on here understand what the word "troll" actually means?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 20 Mar 2011, 17:18, closed)

If only all the stories this week could aspire to the lofty comedic heights you scaled with your hilarious anecdote of a casual fumble in a 2CV. That was pure gold, distilled Swiftian wit in text form, and oh so obviously true.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sun 20 Mar 2011, 2:17, closed)

Oh. Is it your turn to play midnight puppydog?
How dreary.
( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 20 Mar 2011, 16:05, closed)

Predictable.
( Happy Phantom has been to Hastings, Brighton, and Eastbourne too, Sun 20 Mar 2011, 16:20, closed)

Obsessed much?

( Dr. Shambolic je suis charlie, Sun 20 Mar 2011, 17:05, closed)

I find
confiscating a phone is enough.

But you could always abuse a position of authority to humiliate a child in front of a class of other children too.

Idiot
(Ludacrust alliterated your monstrously magnanimous mother, Sat 19 Mar 2011, 10:01, closed)

My french teacher did this.
He was voted 'most likely to be set on fire by a pupil'.

Belittling kids that couldn't keep up, or weren't very bright, often reducing them to tears.
I was not one of the picked on, as I was a teachers kid.

I utterly hated the atmosphere in the lesson, and learned very little.
(speedevil, Sat 19 Mar 2011, 19:36, closed)

Not so much of a post on topic
More the delusional ravings of a non-entity
(erewhon, Wed 23 Mar 2011, 13:16, closed)