spots are easily visible
as a teenager, i babysat my 2 young cousins every saturday night, from 7p.m till lunchtime the next day. for this, i got a fiver. not much, but my aunt was so skint, she often went without food so that her kids could eat. before you say "well, she had enough money to go out once a week", she didn't, she usually just went to stay at her boyfriend's house.
that said, she was and still is utterly fucking nuts.
one saturday, i arrived to find the house eerily quiet.
"where are the kids?" i asked.
"oh, they're upstairs. katie* has a headache and david* has a tummy ache. i think they've had too many sweets." with that, she went on her merry way.
after watching telly for a while, i decided to go upstairs to see if the kids needed anything. imagine my surprise when i saw that they were covered from head to foot in itchy red spots. they both had chickenpox and you didn't need to be a doctor to spot it.
i managed to locate a bottle of calamine lotion and used it on their poor itchy spots, before giving them both warm drinks and tucking them into bed.
the next day, when my aunt arrived home, i said "why didn't you tell me the kids had chickenpox?"
"MY CHILDREN DO NOT HAVE CHICKENPOX!" she yelled at me. "um, yes, they do," i replied. "they're covered in red spots and they're both itchy. they need to see a doctor"
this produced a torrent of bizarre ranting from my aunt, along the lines of i'm not a doctor, i don't know what i'm talking about and her children aren't dirty(?).
well used to my aunt's crazy ways, i simply jumped on my bike and went home.
the next day, my aunt was at my mum's house, phoning the doctor. apparently, she'd told my mum the kids were fine when she left, but they had full-blown chickenpox when she got home, so i must have given it to them, despite the fact that it had been 6 years since i'd had chickenpox.
that bitch is crazy.

*names changed to protect the innocent from terminl embarrassment.
( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 1 Nov 2010, 18:25, 4 replies)

Unclean! Unclean!

( BrokenCoccyx doesn't mind if you grope on, Mon 1 Nov 2010, 20:17, closed)

arf!

( Smash Monkey lowering the tone of the whole internet, Mon 1 Nov 2010, 21:50, closed)

Barf!

(Wibblist Last said "Wibble" on, Mon 1 Nov 2010, 22:46, closed)

Snarf!

(MrOli is ugly, but in the morning you will be sober, Tue 2 Nov 2010, 13:03, closed)