The teaching profession has more than it's fair share of cunts, bitches, arseholes and wankers. Especially those who teach younger kids, they're the biggest bastards of all. It seems they mostly hate children ... and most of them are mothers.

Being a young, fresh-out-of-uni teacher, on a staff full of 40-something women, seems to automatically bring out the latent bully in otherwise-mature ladies.

A sample - not very funny or interesting, just venting:

My first job, working with a fat cow who worked 2.5 days a week, yet was always slacking off and asking for more APT (additional preparation time).

Her main topics of staffroom conversation were the new shoes she'd just bought (which were always ugly and obviously too small for her lardy feet), and the diet pills she took that gave her an explosively squirty bum whenever she ate fatty foods. Which she did, almost exclusively.

Who would blag an afternoon off, then bark at me, 5 minutes before classes started, "You have to teach the class today!", then leave. I would have to ask the kids what they'd been doing, and make up a lesson on the spot.

She also berated me for letting a few kids out a couple of minutes early. These kids went to the classroom of their siblings to wait for them, which she considered a disturbance.

Cue her screaming at me, in front of the remainder of the class, plus their waiting parents, with the general theme of, "Who do you think you are?"
Never said a word to the kids who had allegedly caused the 'disturbance'.

We used to smoke in the disused PE storage room, that was usually left open, so that teachers could go in and smoke during their leisure.

She decided that it should be kept locked, in case some of the kids went in there. They never did, but ... She bullied another teacher, who was the PE coordinator, into locking it between breaks. HER breaks. Which meant the rest of us had to smoke with her, or not at all.

This was ridiculous, so the key was kept at the front of the PE teacher's pigeon hole, and we could run and collect it, have a quick fag, then put it back.
However, she decided that I didn't need to smoke with the other teachers, as I had my own office to smoke in.
Never mind that it was in my classroom, and the windows were sealed shut.

So, she complained that I took too many smoke-breaks (I was only able to take them with her, remember?), and the ensuing fuss she made ensured that all teachers were banned from smoking on the premises.
Which she twisted into a story that made it sound like I had caused the whole ban.

All because she was a spiteful old cow who was trying to piss me off.
Found out on my last day that she'd applied for my job and been denied, which was why she was such a cunt to me. Very mature.
(Celerydemon, Fri 25 Jan 2008, 3:10, 1 reply)

Teaching
I used to work as a supply teach in a secondary school occasionally, enough to be known by the kids and for me to pick up a few names.

One day I'm asked to cover a maths class for a teacher, and she's left work for the kids to do so she's obviously well prepared (this wasn't work thought up in 5 minutes, honest).

The work in question was a load of Sudoku puzzles.
2 problems:
A) It was for a year 7 class
B) They were a low achievement class with various behavioural issues so attention span was going to be an issue

Great method of matching the work to the fucking class.

She was a fat bitch too

Still, got through the lesson.
(Fuckarma was masturbating into your handbag, Fri 25 Jan 2008, 11:44, closed)