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This is a question Cheap Tat

OneEyedMonster remindes us about the crap you can buy in pound shops: "Batteries that lasted about an hour and then died. A screwdriver with a loose handle so I couldn't turn the damn screw, and a tape measure which wasn't at all accurate."

Similarly, my neighbour bought a lawnmower from Argos that was so cheap the wheels didn't go round, it sort of skidded over the grass whilst gently back-combing it.

What's the cheapest, most useless crap you've bought?

(, Fri 4 Jan 2008, 7:26)
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A couple of summers ago I was working at a load of festivals - long hours, good pay, free bands and hotels right next to the festival sites. We'd bought booze to consume while in the hotel but a few minutes before jumping in the van from London I realised that we didn't have a corkscrew. Knowing the area, I immediately shunned suggestions of picking one up from a small off-license or pound shop, instead choosing to run around the corner to a more reputable chain of large elastic pound stores.

The corkscrew was 99p, shiny and looked eager to get some action - despite its slight frame and quivering arms. It was a good price though - it'll probably get lost in the festival carnage and as long as it opens a couple of bottles of plonk then its time on this earth will have been fruitful.

Imagine my disappointment: the corkscrew was released from the packaging only to buckle while opening the very first bottle. As I neared that delightful pop of the cork, the frail virgin screw bent to just shy of a 90 degree angle... ashamed and embarrassed that its manhood should fail so catastrophically on its very first outing.

Adding to this awful turn of events was the fact that we had managed to find the only bar in the world that didn't have a corkscrew. Thus the wine went untapped, unlike our wallets at the festival bars.
(, Tue 8 Jan 2008, 17:36, Reply)

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