Impostor DVDs
Over the Christmas period, drawn as i was into the shops, in a zombie-esque hunt for anything cheap that i could pass off as a gift, I suffered the great misfortune of finding myself in one of the many faceless corporate machines, known commonly as Woolworths.

Eventually, my fruitless systematic trudge about the store brought me to the films section, where i proceeded to peruse the many pretentious titles, ranging from the demonstrably boring, to the vaguely irksome. I searched in vain for anything fitting my budget of around 50 pence. This was admittedly an ambitious goal, but i continued none the less to search for the cheapest excuse for a DVD on the shelf.

Then, behold! My prayers had been answered - "28 weeks later" and "300", all mine for the price of only £3.50 each! This was more than i hoped to spend, but hey! It was Christmas!

So, Christmas Day arrived, and i received my prezzies, safe in the knowledge that my own gifts would not be utter disappointments. Then, behold! i was wrong. I watched as my brother and sister opened their carefully wrapped chunks of my earnings, expecting at the very least if not looks of excitement and glee, then perhaps mild appreciation.

Instead i was greeted with a puzzled expression from my brother [10], which i would later find out meant something along the lines of "Why did he give me a history documentary?", and a rather insulted look from sister [13], inquiring as to why she should have any need for a post-op film about breast enhancement.

*has egg on face*
(ShitBitch, Wed 9 Jan 2008, 14:47, Reply)