Couldn't happen to a nicer fella......
Before going to uni I spent the summer working in a semi-popular restaraunt chain (not beef-eater, the other one) behind the bar.

One night a bloke comes in, obviously on a date and in a snooty voice asks for the wine list. At the time wine was not my thing, but I, like many bar staff, had memorised certain key terms from the wine list in order to scrape by.

After a look, he orders a medium red, I do the business cork wise and off he totters to find a quiet spot with his lady friend. Minutes later he comes back up complaining about the wine, I was worried it'd be a technical query and I'd be out of my depth, instead the conversation went thus:

HE: I want to complain about this wine.
ME: What seems to be the trouble?
HE: It's not cold enough, it's bl**dy room temperature!
ME: Er, red wine is not served chilled.
HE: What!?
ME: Well, white wine is chilled but red wine isn't.
HE: This is ridiculous, I demand a chilled bottle!
ME: (sigh) OK, the only problem is we don't keep any bottles of red in the fridge, if you'd like to come back in an hour or two I'll have one then.
HE: Are you taking the p**s!?
ME: (yes) no sir.

Off he went, not sure whether to explain this to his date for fear she too would laugh at him! T W U N T

Apologies for the mo-hassive post.
(Hip By Association, Fri 2 Jan 2004, 16:38, Reply)