The worst poetry in the world
I was walking around Swansea town centre one day. I was unemployed at that point, so I was aimlessly wandering between shops to kill time, knowing that I couldn't really afford to buy anything. Of course, if you appear to be directionless and vague in your intentions, you'll get approached by a charity campaigner or a market researcher or suchlike. I seem to be a magnet for them, anyway, and I assume that's why.

Anyway, I don't really mind talking to such people if I'm not in a rush, and I'm certainly polite to them. Manners don't cost anything, and they must have tedious working days! A young man approached me, and I was glad to be asked for a one-off donation rather than a direct-debit type contribution.

"Would you be interested in buying one of our poetry books? Our charity buys new wheelchairs for disabled children!" was the jist of the patter, after the usual charm had been laid on. The 'book' he was holding appeared to be about ten glossy A5 pieces of paper folded in half and stapled.

"Yes, of course!" I said, and looked in my wallet for change, expecting to give about £1.50.

"That's £4. Don't worry, I can change a £5 note!" he suggested helpfully.

I dubiously handed over the surprisingly large amount, thinking that at least I was assisting a worthwhile cause. I walked off a little way and had a look at the booklet. I wasn't expecting anything special, but the verses inside really were...*drivel*! I dearly wish I'd have kept it now so I could give an example. To make it worse, the 'poems' clearly weren't written by any children supported by the charity because the language and spelling used was obviously American.

It doesn't matter, the money still goes to charity. Well, this is why I felt conned - the information given on the last page stated how my contribution had been beneficial because it kept the seller in a job and off benefits provided by the taxpayer. I can't remember the name of this 'charity' but it then stated how it did buy wheelchairs and suchlike for children when it *could*, or when it was *asked*, or when some miraculously became available, or something. Essentially, it seemed fairly unlikely that it ever actually happened. I suppose they were truthful in order to escape troubles incurred by projecting an out-and-out lie as to their purpose, but...yes, I'm an idiot! I'm sure the seller was in a position where he could have got a legitimate job; he certainly wasn't homeless.

It made me cross, but probably mostly because I felt stupid. I think that was the reason I threw the booklet away so I wouldn't have to explain my embarrassment to anyone who might see it. Really I suppose I should have written a letter of complaint, or whatever...or perhaps I really did help someone somehow, but probably just a pushy charmer without a good cause, or some sort of boss in charge of a scam. Great.

P.S. If you thought this post was a bit rubbish, you should have seen the poetry! I think one of the works of art was simply a list of the contents of a packed lunch.
(Ovaltina, Fri 19 Oct 2007, 3:36, Reply)