I was a keen Scout as a lad
And once 15 went into the older section, Venture Scouts. One of our leaders was a guy called Shaun, who was a keen mountaineer. Tragically he died in an accident in the Cairngorms, so we all go the funeral in our Scout uniforms, and then to the tea afterwards.

Shaun's female relatives were going around with pots of tea and coffee and plates of triangle sandwiches and fairycakes. His mother came by our table at the exact moment when a fellow Venture Scout asked me, "So, Chinaman, what films have you see recently?"

I innocently named the two most recent films I'd seen. "Cliffhanger, and Shallow Grave."

Silence. Then it struck me.
(McChinaman banned, Thu 12 May 2011, 16:26, 2 replies)

I bet you wished the ground would swallow you up.

( Je suis un vagabond is an unfunny, up your own arse middle class knob, Thu 12 May 2011, 16:29, closed)

Could've tried...
The Englishman Who Went Up a Hill But Came Down a Mountain. If he was English.
( shinyshinyscalp less a man, more a way of life, Thu 12 May 2011, 17:21, closed)