The Hugh Grant/Divine Brown joke
The full story of the Hugh Grant/Divine Brown joke…

Okay, the joke first -

Hugh Grant has just picked up Ms Brown in his car in downtown LA (coincidently just around the time his latest film, Nine Months in which he played a father who went to jail…I believe - the film bombed, despite all the free publicity).
She's about to get down to business when Grant, being the perfect Englishman tells her she's beautiful and adds, "Are you part Native American Indian, Navaho perhaps?"
Divine in typical American deadpan style replies, "Navaho? No suh. I's a New York Ho."

Not a side-splitting belly laugh but at the time it raised a smirk.


So there am I all those years back (I think it was around ten or eleven years ago) and I was attempting to impress then husband and my dad with my joke telling prowess.

And in my opinion any story is always better told with the aid of actions and some embellishment - in other words if my joke was the family dog I would be dressing it up in full evening dress and parading it down the High Street.

Hugh Grant's lines were told with the added accompaniment of a stuttering toff accent, blinking and flicking of imaginary floppy fringe.

My audience were nodding with recognition of my Hugh Grant impression - all well and good. This was clearly going down well….as it were…ahem...

And then I launched into my impression of Divine Brown.

As a streetwise prostitute from the USA clearly I'd need to do the broad New York accent (never mind that she was in LA - a minor detail) and my entire experience of Yankee Hoes (of the lady type rather than the garden variety) was from Starsky and Hutch or Hill Street Blues. Therefore in my head she would wear a mini skirt, tight tee-shirt, platform shoes and chew gum. So I began….

*Lip smacking* "Navaho?" *Chew, lip smack*, "No suh." *Chew, chew, lip smack, chew*, "I's a New York Ho." *Chew, lip smack, chew*

My audience were crying with laughter. Fantastic! Brilliant! My joke is a success!

And at that moment I caught my dad's eye and realised….


The joke isn't that funny.


Unless you make out that Divine Brown is actually giving Hugh Grant a blow job as she's answering.


And then you tell that joke to your dad.



Your dad.
( chickenlady b3ta's very own Elizabeth Taylor, Sat 29 Nov 2008, 21:39, Reply)